Don't Like the Government's Social/Safety Restrictions? Private Business Could, But Won't. Yet Someone Still Needs To ...

(Edited)

So I just had a talk with my father-in-law.  As he knows, I refuse to ever discuss politics, because after watching him and my husband fight over it, I just realized it wasn't a very good idea - so we've just never discussed them.

And before today, we generally agreed on the handling of the virus. 

However, today, for whatever reason, he decided to go off on the governor of his state, as well as Nancy Pelosi.

So I made this one-time exception, because this virus is too real and too dangerous to NOT speak up.

Now, Nancy Pelosi, I don't care  - I agreed with him about her general personality ( I'm not a Pelosi fan, though she does have a point that testing and safety equipment need to be included in this small-business package deal.) 

She wasn't discussed until nearly the end of our conversation, though, that end going something like this: 

Him:  Pelosi is mean, she's a mean person and sinister, she's a troublemaker." 

Me:  "I  agree, she can be, she's essentially a tamed-down Trump in a skirt lol.  But I think Trump still beats her by a long ways in nastiness/meanness and being a crazy troublemaker in general. You don't you think Trump is mean?"

Him: "I think he speaks his mind and people don't like it. He goes off sometimes, but overall, no, he's a good man."

Me:  "Interesting.  I see what you mean about Pelosi, but I think Trump's worse.  In fact, I think he's verbally abusive. Ever read his Twitter feed?  lol.  I just find it interesting, political bias.  It's always easier for people to see it in the opposite party lol.  Especially with how popular it's become to vilify just Democrats.  It wasn't always like that.  It used to be like a balanced marriage, one reined the other in if they went too crazy.  Now it's like a bitter divorce.  S even calls us "libtards" now lol." 

Aside: I did say that last part about what S said in family text on purpose - because I strongly suspected whose mouth these new opinions on the virus came from, versus the last 2 times we spoke - it was like a total 180.

I mean, 3 weeks ago, he was panicked, literally nearly yelling to call the mayor and demand to have her shut down the city and schools to get Mark home (which of course I did not do) lol

Now that our cities and states have reached their peak, they're suddenly all Nazis, we should be protesting the shutdown , and people need to go back to work??? 

And two weeks ago, he was trying to sell me on the fact that God sent the virus as a plague because of greed (which I didn't buy, but did agree there did seem to be a spiritual lesson in it) - but now, people need to make money?

WHAT THE ? 

Who are you and what have you done with my beloved father-in-law? lol

I literally felt like I was talking to a different person.  

I mean - the 180 didn't make any sense.

Thus, it became pretty clear he was parroting S - who has been bitching about shutdowns since Day One and has been on a mission to make the virus as political as he possibly could ;)

Mark and I already suspected that S had run to him and played the victim, after he'd increasingly worked political propaganda into the family group-text conversation that became increasingly "one-upping" competitive and personal, instead of just having fun and being supportive, like everyone else in the conversation was doing - so I called him on it - and then I bowed out of the thread rather than play petty competition games - we already have enough stress without that BS ;) 

Regardless, my FIL got mad, raised his voice. 

 Him:  "I don't want to discuss politics and argue with you."  

I'm thinking, "You brought it up," - but I didn't say so.

 I just waited until he was finished then quietly said:  

Me: "I ... didn't realize we were arguing? We're not arguing -  are we? I was responding to what you said, telling you where I agreed, but then asked if you saw the same qualities in Trump. You answered you essentially didn't, so that's that, I guess we disagree."

Him:  "I don't know!  I don't have an answer!  Have you ever lost a business, Chrystal?  I don't think so. It's rough."

He was clearly still upset, by the tone of his voice.   

Me: "No, I'm sure it is.  Well, in a way I have, actually, my job was outsourced four times, working two, sometimes three jobs to make ends meet during the recession and it didn't matter.  Have you ever been homeless?   I'm not trying to downplay business loss, both business loss and job loss can be rough.  Regardless, this time, we have a choice with this one, our health or not.  

He was now silent, so I continued.  

(However, he was on speaker phone, so my husband became angry with his dad, at this point, because although his father blames the government, Mark blames his dad, believing the business loss thing could've been avoided had his Dad made different choices.)

Me:  "Okay. Well, I love you. I'm not mad at you, I hope you're not mad at me?

Him:  "I'm not mad!  I'm a positive person, I'm always positive!  I don't vilify anyone!  I don't want to discuss politics! I am NOT vindictive!"

Me:  "I ... never said you were vindictive?  I don't think you're vindictive.  Vindictive?  How did THAT  ... ya know what?  Never mind.  Okay.  Well, I hope we're okay. ARE we okay?  

Him:  "Chrystal, everything is fine, don't start this! I love you. Thank you for the toilet paper"

Me:  "Oh ... kay. You're welcome?  I love you, too, here's Mark" 

????

I'm ... not sure what he thought I was starting by asking him if we were okay?

And apparently, he clearly forgot that he was the one that brought it up in the first place - by being negative about the governor, Pelosi, and Democrats in Congress. lol

But okay, fine -  we'll let him believe he's always positive and that I brought it up, even though that's not reality, because he needs to believe that so badly :)

Because - sigh - this is not the first time I've been in this situation with people, and I think I've finally learned to just let people believe what they need to, despite reality and physical proof to the complete opposite of what they believe.

However, the one thing I did forget was the golden rule of dysfunctional families - you're not allowed to say "I disagree and here's why" - even with sugar on top - even if the person directly insults you (which he didn't, I'm just saying in general dysfunctional families) - or you're "starting an argument" or "creating drama." 

Thus, I imagine this will turn out the same way and get flipped back on me as "starting" something that wasn't even an argument, there will somehow end up being a victim situation, despite there not being one, simply because all dysfunctional families have to have a victim, don't they?

People can't just politely disagree in dysfunctional families, no -there has to be a victim, or there wouldn't be any unnecessary drama ;)

One person has to the perpetrator and one person has to be the victim, lest you break dysfunctional family tradition ;)

(Thus, why I'm writing this publicly, for anyone curious to know my perspective on that conversation.)

I then texted and said I broke my rule never to discuss politics with him, because this virus was too dangerous not to, but that it wouldn't happen again.

Regardless, Pelosi and Trump being crazy a-holes was NOT my overall point in that conversation lol.

My overall point was this ...

Unfortunately, the truth is, we cannot rely on each other in society to respect each others' safety, health, and well being and keep society safe from this virus if left to our own devices - because we don't love our neighbors as ourselves.

So then it does take restrictions, rules, and laws to ensure that we keep society safe.

I understand that businesses need to reopen and that there are many who don't like their governors' restrictions. 

And it may be true that in some cases/states, governors may have taken things too far.

However, I'd rather them be safe than sorry, err on the side of caution.

So you don't want the government to make social and safety restrictions and get back to work?

Fine - but considering people don't respect the safety, health, and well-being of others already - then who will?  Because someone will still need to.

Corporate and private businesses could be the ones making the restrictions and ensuring public safety of their employees and customers - but they aren't. 

Are we hearing "We're going to provide masks and gloves and sanitize daily and will pay for the full healthcare costs of anyone who gets COVID-19?" 

No, we are not. 

In fact, all we're hearing are pushes for lower-level employees to risk their own health by defying social distancing and raise all kinds of hell at the governors, doing the dirty work on behalf of execs and shareholders, who don't dare put themselves at risk to do so.

Thus, it's proof positive these protesters are clearly nothing more than expendable pawns to these companies, pushing them to protest.

When companies, corporations, execs, shareholders and politicians talk more about ensuring safety of employees and customers than they do about raising hell with governors, THEN we'll talk about reopening and using their businesses, ever again  :)