Emmy Social-Distancing Fails, But CORE's Table Read of Fast Times at Ridgemont High is a Winner :)

(Note:  Updates on the family member with COVID will be added to the original post on the subject.)

So ... I had to stop watching the Emmys. Not because it was already weird, as the Emmys were being delivered to people's homes by people in ridiculous Hazmat-type suits, but because people were also having huge parties - with not just family - at their homes, and eventually took off their masks to hug each other  - and it made me incredibly nervous.

Interestingly, though those these "oops" moments were plentiful, there aren't a lot of pictures of them available (in fact even this one only shows a partial mask) which is probably an intentional good thing - more about a culture trying to maintain social distancing upkeep, rather than trying to hide it/be dishonest ;) 

Other people who visited the Staples auditorium, who despite being in otherwise funny (but slightly too mocking) skit about social distancing, got entirely too close to Jimmy Kimmel, neither of them wearing masks.  

In fact, though I can't find a picture of it, trust me, they got much closer then this without masks on ...

Jennifer Aniston, this means mostly you,  defeating the purpose about an otherwise funny skit about social distancing.  

As opposed to Tracee Ellis Ross, who did it right, and never got close enough to Jimmy for them to even get a picture together ...

Then you had a surprise Zoom visit by Lisa Kudrow and Courtney Cox at you home as a semi-Friends reunion, which I ordinarily would've been super excited about - if you weren't sitting so close together WITHOUT MASKS on!

All right, now, we love you all, but I'm gonna have to get my rant on a minute.

Just because you live together, or are a family on your shows, doesn't mean you are in real life - and shouldn't get that close together without wearing masks!

In fact, wasn't the production of Batman just halted because Robert Pattinson contracted COVID?

Look, I get it - we're all tired of social distancing, this could be your only shot at a win, and when people get together and get excited, it's natural to want to hug others and move closer to people - but that is exactly what continues to spread this virus, and what masks are for!

COVID does not care that you're a celebrity or that you just won an Emmy, or that this could be your only win - you are not immune.

Just because you are celebrities doesn't mean you're immune - as Tom Hanks, Robert Pattison, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Idris Alba, and many, many others have proven.

If you want to risk that, don't do it on camera, please?

My husband's stepdad is currently in the hospital with both COVID and pneumonia, in the fight of his life - not so funny when it hits home, is it?

(In fact, Mark walked out of the room during the Jennifer Aniston/Jimmy Kimmel "fumigation" skit, angry that they were, in his words, "mocking" the dangerousness of COVID.  I'm not sure I took it the same way, but with his stepdad in the hospital, I get it. )

If you're role models -act like it - especially if you're my self-proposed liberals who supposedly support science!

I turned it off not long after Mark left the room and saw the Schitt's Creek winners removing their masks and hugging - it was making me crazy - nervous and frustrated for the spread of COVID - so I turned it off, sorry :/

Now -  rant over :)

And just so as not to be too hard on Jennifer Aniston - because I actually otherwise really like Jennifer Aniston -  here's an example of where she did a good thing - the cold table read, via Zoom, of "Fast Times at Ridgemont High." 

The event was sponsored by CORE (Community Organized Effort Relief), all of the donations and proceeds going to CORE, to provide free testing and support, and starred Jennifer Aniston, Brad Pitt, Jimmy Kimmel, Julia Roberts, Matthew McConnaughey, John Legend, Shia Lebeouf, Ray Liotta, Henry Goulding, Sean Penn, and Dane Cook, with narrated screen direction by Morgan Freeman.

If you haven't seen it, the full video is  below, and worth a watch - both for Shia Labeouf's take on Spiccoli - which Sean Penn, the original Spiccoli, got a big kick out of) - or  for Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt's re-enactment of the red bikini fantasy scene via Zoom, which was both awkward and adorable, considering their ancient history together.  

Jennifer handled it like a pro, where as Brad was clearly a bit embarrassed - aw, he actually turned red. 

(Now, Brad, you know you deserved that embarrassing moment, after publicly humiliating her by leaving her for Angelina Jolie, didn't you? Good for you, for taking it on the chin for charity ;)

All the other actors clearly were interested in this moment - even Shia Labeouf broke character for a second to directly watch them on Zoom screen - with Julia Roberts having the best lip-biting-smile reaction over it - do you blame them?  

Thank God that Morgan Freeman was there to transition it along  (but did include a "Lord have mercy" lol)

And if nothing else, it's worth a watch for Brad Pitt in the pirate hat? lol

Or just looking at Brad Pitt, I couldn't stop staring - even though he was a bit disheveled, and at first, I thought he was going to play Spiccoli lol. 

Brad Pitt has almost the same effect on me that Paul Newman and Alexander Dreymon has on me onscreen, I just can't stop staring - ever since I first saw him in Thelma and Louise!

(Yes, my husband knows, he gets the same way about certain women like Angelina Jolie or Michelle Yeoh lol).

My God, he's so sexy - I mean, look at him - that man is 56 years old and genetically blessed, it's crazy!

This video really revealed that Jennifer Aniston had more plastic surgery than he even thought about (her face looks a bit - distorted, especially around the mouth?), and he still looks THAT good! 

Speaking of bad plastic surgery, what the hell happened to Dane Cook's face!?!

People used to confuse him with Ryan Reynolds ...

(Ryan Reynolds and Dane Cook in the mid-2000s)

Yeah, that's not going to happen ever again, jeez.

And just in case you're wondering why he fell off the planet in general, circa 2010, it's because first, several other comedians accused him of stealing their material, and then his brother, who was his manager, stole all his money and is now in prison.

In fact, I'd feel sorry for him, if it weren't for stealing other people's material:/

And I'm not against plastic surgery, and might someday get Botox or a nip and tuck here and there, if I had the money - but this is what happens when you go plastic surgery nuts!

And don't do fillers, people - ever! 

(Fillers always do a bad job, they're not where they need to be yet! 

That's clearly what Jennifer and Dane have had done, in addition to Dane's botched facelift.  Fillers makes the area around the filler injection lumpy, especially around the mouth).

Look at Brad and Julia, who although do appear to have Botox sometimes (especially Julia),  otherwise allows a few wrinkles or signs of aging, with no weird lumps and stretches around the mouth, beyond the normal that accrue with age - again, even with Julia, Botox, not fillers.

Anyway, without further ado, I give you the Zoom cold table read of  the script of "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" :)

You probably want to skip past Mayor Garcetti's speech, which goes on entirely too at the beginning (almost a full 5 minutes), just saying ;)

By the way, just in case you were worried that Shia had a relapse, because he's acting so weird and wasted even during the pre-read interview, no worries, it's not a relapse - Shia is a method actor, he's in character the entire time, even in the pre-show interview, because that's just what Shia does - it's method acting :)

Go Shia! Back on the A-list, where he belongs!

Okay, I've already spoken ad nauseum about my adoration for Shia's acting skills and joy that they've accepted him back on the A-list, so I'll stop. 

And no, that's not real weed, and I'm not sure about the cigarettes - Hollywood does have fake cigarettes and weed for smoke effect, you know :)