It's unfortunate that people are so focused on a couple of sentences said by Harry on the "Armchair Expert" with Dax Shepard and Monica Padman podcast, because he had so many other insightful, intelligent things to say during the hour-long chat.
And in fact, even those comments weren't a criticism of the royal family members individually, but how the system under which they are required to live isn't conducive to good mental health.
The point - which so many intent on finding something they can use to weaponize and demonize are missing - is Harry is championing mental health, trying to take away the stigma surrounding struggling with trauma and mental health, proving that your wealth, privilege, and/or fame won't actually solve that problem or take away your mental health struggles and pain.
In fact, the pressure to pretend like you don't struggle with these issues is that much greater - and the only thing helped by the wealth, privilege, and notoriety is that these things can help you better hide it, thereby making your issues worse/enabling them.
For the full podcast, listen HERE.
Be advised that Dax Shepard - comedian/actor husband of actress, Kristen Bell - is a comedian and uses some very colorful language - he and his wife are both very fond of honest and open sharing - of not only difficult pasts, but daily family and parenting struggles and mistakes (particularly during COVID lockdown with their now pre-teen twin daughters), often with humor - so as to normalize/take away the mystique of being a celebrity.
Both discuss here that those who are going to pathologize and demonize their openness and mistakes are only doing so out of their own issues with cultural standards; so in fact, it says more about them, that it does the celebrity.
That's likely why Prince Harry chose Dax Shepard's show to talk about this on, because he, too, is committed to demystifying the "perfect celebrity" status.
The interview/chat is also to help promote Oprah's upcoming series on May 21st on AppleTV, called "The Me You Can't See", which includes not only Price Harry, but other celebrities regarding mental health struggles.
As a hilarious side note, Dax's commentary, after Dax points out that Oprah and Harry could not have had two more polar opposite upbringings and how interesting it was that they found a way to connect on this issue.
Harry replied that it's also an important reminder that the status people are born into can change.
Dax jokingly says something akin to, "Well, yeah - look at Oprah's almost a queen, and you're nearly a sharecropping farmer."LOL!
(Which Harry also found hilarious, even though not exactly what he meant lol).
Also interesting is Dax's personal commentary.
For those unaware, Dax is a former alcoholic/drug addict, sober since 2005, with a very open relapse in 2020 after a motorcycle accident with a beginning addiction to opioid painkillers.
Dax grew up in suburban Detroit (Highland Park), where he says it's not okay to talk about trauma or feelings, especially fear.
In Detroit, which has an especially "tough" reputation, men talking about trauma or even true feelings, rather than "pretending," is seen as "weakness" or "negativity" and is erroneously perceived as making you "less of a man" - regardless of your race, social status, wealth, or political leanings - which, IMO, helps contribute to the city's overall dysfunction and unhealth.
("Amen," says my husband from suburban-East Detroit, who became an Army ranger largely to prove his "toughness" and "manhood" to the culture in which he was raised, and who oftentimes struggles with talking about his true feelings, especially fear - but also realizes the importance of doing so, after traumatic military experiences .)
For the record, though not as "tough," there was/is a similar mentality of being "weak" if not physically or mentally fit, according to community standards, growing up in suburban Cincinnati and especially Kentucky - UNLESS - your story was given in religious positive testimony after it was "over," and ended with "but God healed me/provided for me, I'm blessed."
In fact, during Dax's recovery, he talked about things long hidden like being molested as a child and physical abuse by his stepfather, the trauma and pain of which he tried to drown out with alcohol and drugs, rather than deal with, and also masked his struggles with humor.
I say bravo to both men for their courage and bravery to talk about these issues publicly - with a sense of humor!
On that note, though Dax has admitted, like others, that his sense of humor was often used to mask a lot of pain, it's important to remember to still keep it - because your sense of humor is a coping skill.
It's a balance. It's life. Ya deal with reality and cry a little, then laugh a little at the absurdity of it all - we humans have the capacity to do both for a reason :)
Again, when it comes to our culture, I really wish we would move away from over-focus on 'cancel' culture - because it's really not so much a cultural cancelation as it is a cultural re-evaluation.
Think of it more like cleaning out our cultural closet - deciding what we still need and what has been beneficial to our culture versus getting rid of unhealthy items that have never worked for anyone, have actually hurt so many others for a long time, and have held us back from being the healthiest and best that we can be, growing closer in unity :)
Some things can still be held onto for purely nostalgic or sentimental value, sure - but other times, those sentimental things we keep and hold onto aren't healthy, and our selfish need to hold onto them is actually not only hurting others, but holding us back from moving forward and being healthy - so it may be time to just let go and say goodbye to them.
For example, in keeping with that closet-cleaning analogy, let's say you kept a bunch of old love letters, photos, or trinkets from an old love in a special box in your closet, though currently married.
And yet it still hurt her, the fact that he still clearly revered that woman, whoever she was, all those years later - you could see the hurt on her face, before she quickly pretended it didn't. :(
So ... are you going to keep holding onto them anyway, out of some sense of delusional nostalgia that isn't reflective of actual reality, despite the fact that it's causing others pain?
I would hope not. Because if you do, there are still going to be problems - and they're likely your fault - out of your refusal to move forward with your spouse, out of your own selfish needs.
Well, the same is true for our culture. How long are you going to hold on to old cultural ideas like idealized past-love letters, that if you're totally honest, never worked out, for you or anyone, and they are currently hurting other people in your life, keeping everyone back from moving forward and growing closer in unity?
Do you really want to be responsible for that?
"... at least men step outside and duke it out like real men rather than passive-aggressively smile in your face like you're best friends, but pour something in your coffee later, smear you behind your back, or sabotage your paycheck or actual work"
"Okay, so we'll discuss this later, because you're not hearing me, you're reacting emotionally, getting unnecessarily defensive about Detroit, which I don't get, because I'm not comparing cities or dissing Detroit! I don't disagree with you, so I don't know who you're arguing with?"
"I can't stand Lexington myself, you know that, and you also know that I had issues with my hometown, Cincinnati. Because in fact, Midwest and Southern mentalities aren't as different as you think, they're actually very similar in many ways - which is the part I think you took offense to - you wanted me to say that Detroit was better."
"What I am talking about is general cultural antiquated definitions of toughness, manhood, and glorification of violence, which are more exaggerated in some communities versus others, and in many ways, when it comes to physical aggression and violence, Kentucky isn't that different from Detroit, especially in Eastern Kentucky. I know you want me to say it is, but IMO, it isn't. "
"But what I DO get, now - because of your unnecessary and over-defensiveness of Detroit when no one has dissed Detroit - is that you don't hold onto prior loves, but Detroit itself is like your box of love letters in your closet lol."
"You hold onto it, idealize it, build a shrine to it, and keep it in a metaphorical love-letter box in a metaphorical closet, despite the fact that there were clearly problems in Detroit, or you wouldn't have given up on it so easily, left, and moved here (a year before he met me), now, would you?"
Whether it's Detroit or here or wherever, nothing is going to get better in our culture until we are willing to start re-evaluating our own culture - and yes, that includes both of our hometowns.