Can't Stop Crying ....

Here is the article about the crash - the family just told us it was Marian last night.  She was leaving church when a drunk driver hit her head on.

I haven't slept much.  I'd wake up and start crying again.  I'm crying now.

Just got off the phone with her pastor, Jesse, who is one of the kindest men I've ever met.  

No one else is allowed to visit her but family (she has a huge family) - and Jesse and his wife.

He told me she isn't in any pain and hasn't been -  she's been in a coma since the moment it happened, a week ago.

In fact, there has been no brain activity at all - and life support will be pulled tomorrow.

So I asked him if he would hold her hand and whisper this message in her ear: 

"Marian, you were one of the greatest blessings of my life.  I am so grateful - to you and for you - for all you did for  me and for my family.   I just know  the first thing Jesus will say to you is 'Well done, my good and faithful servant.' "

"I miss you so much I can't breathe, but I will be okay.  You go to him now and I WILL see you again someday.   Goodbye, Marian.  I love you. "

Her name was Marian Wind Englebrecht.

She was my mother when my mom couldn't be.

And she was my superhero.

In fact, about a month ago, I asked her what color of cape she wanted, and I dubbed her with a superhero name - "The Shalominator."

She laughed and laughed.  

God, I will miss that laugh. 

During the pandemic, one of her sons moved in and bought a bunch of new farm animals - ducks, turkeys, chickens, geese -  which  of course Marian ended up taking care of herself :/

She was feeling pretty overwhelmed, so I wanted to make her laugh.  

Being able to make Marian laugh was one of my favorite things in this world. 

So I said, "Hey, on the bright side, now I know what to get you for Christmas.  I will complete your new unwanted menagerie and buy you a donkey, you can shorten your name to "Mary," and you can ride it into town for Christmas. That'll get the town talking."

She laughed SO hard at that :)

God, I will miss that laugh.

I miss you, Shalominator xo