A friend and I were discussing all of the Taylor Swift stuff people say.
I explained to her that I don't judge famous people based on one picture or one bit of speculation or gossip - especially now with AI - and here's why.
So as those of you closest to me know, when I was 11 years old, I was in a TV movie filmed in Cincinnati with Johnny Cash called "The Pride of Jesse Hallam." I played his daughter, Jenny (my maiden name is Smith).
Yep, this is little me at 11 years old - compare to my profile picture and you can see it's me (though I'm 1000 years old now). 😂
I have a couple of private pictures from that time, but those are just for me/those close to me.
In fact, many of you who know me probably still don't know until right now - surprise!?!😂
It's definitely NOT one of the first things I mention to people and only after you get to know me well first, then I might - IF - a subject like this comes up or somebody else tells them and they ask me about it.
That is because people get the wrong idea - they start imagining you must be a diva and love attention and must be melodramatic, or you're not sincere and have an angle, when nothing could be further from the truth - and if they get to know me well first before I tell them, then they know that's not true.
The truth is, I HATE being the center of attention and all eyes on me - even at my own baby shower, I hated that!
I hated it before I even was in the movie, but I was drawn to acting both because I could become somebody else AND because I'd been told it would help with shyness!
(Yes, and no - this experience actually made my shyness /social anxiety worse.)
In fact, this is why I'm not on social media and blog quietly in the corner, rarely comment elsewhere, and I don't advertise myself or have comments - I started writing here years ago while in a bad situation, just to have a voice when I had none, like a message in a bottle to the universe and affirm my own thoughts "out loud."
In fact, this is why I'm not on social media and blog quietly in the corner, rarely comment elsewhere, and I don't advertise myself or have comments - I started writing here years ago while in a bad situation, just to have a voice when I had none, like a message in a bottle to the universe and affirm my own thoughts "out loud."
Besides, I was TERRIBLE. No, really!
I did well at auditions, but when camera was on, I was like a deer in the headlights! 😂
I never did anything else because, like I said, I was terrible (and got worse with anxiety) - and secondly, I didn't like being in the spotlight, uncomfortable with just being myself - PLUS I became fascinated with all the behind-the-scenes stuff, particularly screenwriting and filmmaking as I got older.
But as a result of that experience, I learned very quickly and at a very young age, what people don't know, they make up - and you're damned if you do, damned if you don't.
The making stuff up part is almost always out of their own issues - usually either to feel closer to you, appear like they are close to you, and sometimes just plain old jealousy if negative - which I didn't realize at 11 years old.
In fact, I STILL have a hard time believing that anyone was ever jealous or felt competitive with me about anything! I mean, I'm an anxiety-ridden freak 😂
But looking back now, it had to be, in a couple of cases, because there was no other explanation.
People get weird if you're suddenly famous in general - though you may not change, those around you definitely will (keep reading).
And with social media, the speculating stuff is even worse - people imagine they know you because they feel closer to you, making snap judgments based on one picture or one photograph - but they still don't know you.
However, I did NOT have scoliosis in real life, I just played a scoliosis patient on TV 😂
(I was plaster-casted up in Stryker fame like a real scoliosis patient for the movie, but they cut me out hours later - not even as long as real patients have to wear them!)
And with social media, the speculating stuff is even worse - people imagine they know you because they feel closer to you, making snap judgments based on one picture or one photograph - but they still don't know you.
Regardless, I wasn't at all prepared for any of that, nor did I have a stable, supportive home life.
So my experience with 15 minutes of fame was bad enough - I can't even imagine what it must be like for Taylor Swift!
The one moment you're not smiling or don't give somebody you don't even know the $500 they asked for, you're a stuck-up bitch.
So my experience with 15 minutes of fame was bad enough - I can't even imagine what it must be like for Taylor Swift!
The one moment you're not smiling or don't give somebody you don't even know the $500 they asked for, you're a stuck-up bitch.
People will tell you if you don't give them $100, they'll spread a nasty rumor.
Someone will take a picture of you sneezing and say you're drunk (though you don't drink).
Someone will ask you to use your platform for this charity or that one, this political platform or that one. You can imagine how much trouble you'll get in either way.
Your clothes, hair, makeup, every word you say will be under the microscope and overanalyzed.
You have 1000 new friends that aren't really friends, and your close circle of friends start to back away, either because they don't like your new popular crowd friends OR because they're afraid now that you're popular you'll get stuck up, too.
Someone will take a picture of you sneezing and say you're drunk (though you don't drink).
Someone will ask you to use your platform for this charity or that one, this political platform or that one. You can imagine how much trouble you'll get in either way.
Your clothes, hair, makeup, every word you say will be under the microscope and overanalyzed.
You have 1000 new friends that aren't really friends, and your close circle of friends start to back away, either because they don't like your new popular crowd friends OR because they're afraid now that you're popular you'll get stuck up, too.
(I didn't. In fact, I was told the reason I was chosen for this role was NOT because I was the best actress, but because I WASN'T a diva like the SCAPA girls and I was cheap 😂 In fact, the greatest compliment of my life was the cast party toasts that said "To Chrystal, who is still the same humble, genuine little girl we met and choose now as she was before the movie.")
And worst of all, my family dynamics changed dramatically as a result - and irrevocably.
And worst of all, my family dynamics changed dramatically as a result - and irrevocably.
My Dad took my money, my older sister hated me even more.
(She kept saying she was the more talented one and didn't understand why I got all the attention, and truthfully, I didn't either - and I agreed, she WAS more talented and DID deserve it more - so I kept pulling her in interviews so she wouldn't be mad/jealous, but to no avail - still hated me!)
So I can totally understand why child actors go crazy and get into addictions - your family gets weird, you never know who your real friends are, everybody wants something from you, everybody projects their own dastardly motivations onto you or imagine they know what they would do in my shoes
I'm a little messed up, sure, but fortunate that I didn't go the alcohol/drugs route.
Now - as an example of nonsense people make up - interestingly, just after that conversation, I Googled myself in my maiden name and Johnny Cash together, which I haven't done in years, and note that AI said THIS:
Now - as an example of nonsense people make up - interestingly, just after that conversation, I Googled myself in my maiden name and Johnny Cash together, which I haven't done in years, and note that AI said THIS:
The source article for that AI find is THIS ...
What the ????
More reasons not to believe AI finds without checking the source OR everything you read. 😂
Because not a word of that is true except that he played a coal miner and we DID have a close bond at one time.
Because not a word of that is true except that he played a coal miner and we DID have a close bond at one time.
(I was plaster-casted up in Stryker fame like a real scoliosis patient for the movie, but they cut me out hours later - not even as long as real patients have to wear them!)
I DO have scoliosis now, as an adult, but I didn't then!
Also, he did NOT cover my medical expenses (I didn't have any?) - and he especially did not pay for my college!?!
He was a wonderful person and he would have, had I asked for it, but I didn't!
In fact, now that I think about it, I think he DID once offer to pay to college when I was young - but I'd stopped calling him back by my sophomore year of high school, because I was so embarrassed about how lost /depressed I had gotten over family issues/trauma.
Also, he did NOT cover my medical expenses (I didn't have any?) - and he especially did not pay for my college!?!
He was a wonderful person and he would have, had I asked for it, but I didn't!
In fact, now that I think about it, I think he DID once offer to pay to college when I was young - but I'd stopped calling him back by my sophomore year of high school, because I was so embarrassed about how lost /depressed I had gotten over family issues/trauma.
Looking back now, nobody would've understood those family issues better than Johnny, we actually had much in common being considered the "lesser" child, which is probably why we bonded - but I didn't know his own history well then, so I didn't even try to talk to him about it.
Now - the home-cooked meal part at the cast party is partially true - , June brought some home-cooked dishes and added them as an alternative option for the catering.
However, I'm not going to correct this article for 2 reasons:
1) Johnny was a wonderful person, a father figure to me at a time I really needed one, and he would have done so, had I asked for it - but as I said, I stopped calling him back in high school with depression.
2) You can't control what people think, they will think what they want anyway, especially if somebody is hell-bent on either smearing you or singing your praises, if they repeat a rumor long enough.
If Taylor Swift spent all her time correcting false accusations and rumors, she'd have no time for songwriting, Travis and her friends.
This is why she says she rarely looks at social media anymore, in fact!
Kudos to her, I wouldn't have had thick enough skin.
And you may be saying to yourself about Taylor "Aw, poor little rich girl."
Yeah, so money and fame don't fix everything - in fact, they can actually make things worse or create their own set of problems - especially within your own family!
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