My Old Sociology Class Group Presentations ...

 

So my friend and classmate and I were talking about group projects. We're in different classes now, but we still chat. She was talking about having a group project to do, and we were talking about how that worked online.

I said "Now, in f2f life, if memory serves, group projects usually mean you get together, eat snacks and drink, do very little work, so like you and 1 other person will end up doing it all later and the rest just sign off on it." 😂

Thinking more about those old days at the University of Kentucky, I remember my 2 most memorable group presentations were for my Sociology classes (the study of human behavior in groups), always my favorites.

Those classes often ask you to do social experiments like ... stand the wrong way in an elevator or glue a quarter to the floor at the mall and see how many people try to work to get it up and how long they try, and of course, record the results. 

In other words, they always asked you to stir some shit - erm - I mean, challenge social norms to see what happens when you do - and they're usually kind of hilarious. 😂

For one class - we actually decided to do a SNL sort of skit, challenging stereotypes and gender norms - and it ended up being hilarious!

Everybody actually showed up and contributed ideas, that time, which is a rarity for these class group projects.

I remember we all met at the off-campus house of one of our classmates sharing the house with 3 roommates.

They offered us ramen noodles, Pringles, and Milwaukee's Best beer as any good broke college students do! 😂

So the skit was, we decided to dress me up all flowery and feminine and pretend to go to a party (in the skit) - but behave like a man.

So I sat with my legs open (I had leggings on, no worries).

I pretended to scratch and adjust my stuff, if you know what I mean. 

I partook in tobacco dip and spit in a cup (which I really did for the skit, and it was disgusting, but I did it.)

I talked about "getting some" the night before and high-fived the men about having done so.

And then it concluded with my chugging a can of beer (filled with water) and burping loudly. 😂

Let me tell you, it was hard to keep a straight face -  especially when the dip kept falling out of my mouth! 😂

I started to crack up, which only made the dip falling out worse, so I stopped looking my skit-mates in the eye, and just played it up, by picking up all the pieces that had dropped and shoving them back in my mouth, which only made our audience laugh more! 😂

As soon as the skit was over, R handed me the cup and I spit the whole thing out immediately, that was NASTY!

(To which everyone just laughed harder.)

Then R said "Give it up to Chrystal for being a trooper and doing that! I couldn't look at her while trying to dip, especially when it started falling out of her mouth, or I'd lose it."

Then I stood up and did a little lady-like little curtsey  😂

So the point was, of course, to mess with heads about stereotyping and gender roles - and does the class watching our skit get "the ick" with how I behaved?

And forget women - should this behavior okay for MEN?

For the record, I don't think anyone should be loudly burping at parties, men or women, because it's just rude and gross!

I think our point was made - but the class just mostly found it hilarious  😂

However, the one I'm proudest of now, looking back was before that, Sociology 101.

This was the one where we all got together and mostly ate snacks and drank and messed around, but I came up with an idea during it, that they all liked.

Now, before I say this, let me add the caveat that Greeks on a Southern campus in the late 80s and early 90s were not like Greeks in metro areas or more urban environments. 

Let me also state that I realize that not all fraternities and sororities are like this, and in fact, I'm married to a former frat boy (from Detroit) now.

Anyway, none of us in the project group were Greek, with the exception of one guy in a black fraternity.

During our snack and drinkfest, we decided to call all white sorority girls "bowheads" at the time, because they all wore these giant bows on their heads.

And we noticed they all had different reputations like the rich ones, the pretty/handsome ones, the party girls/boys, the athletic ones.

BUT - mind you, this was mostly a cover for our insecurity and fears they wouldn't accept us if we tried - black or poor or from broken families, even some issues to work out maybe.

HOWEVER, after making fun of them for like a half hour, I felt bad and unfair because I didn't really know any of them.

So I came up with the idea to find out if white sororities/fraternities were really as overprivileged and shallow as they appeared, did they self-accept their reputations -  or were we misjudging them, which made us hypocrites?

So I typed up these surveys with these questions on them:

"What kind of person do you want in your sorority/fraternity?"

"What kind of questions do you ask candidates during pledge week?"

"Would you accept someone that doesn't drink/party?"

"Would you accept someone overweight or unattractive?"

"How much does intelligence play a role?"

"Would you accept a person of color?"

"Would you accept someone Jewish?"

"Would you accept someone who was gay?"

"Would you accept someone disabled?"

Then myself and a group-project member went around to all the "most reputable" white Greek houses and explained it was for a class and asked them if they could have 2 people answer them and the answers would be anonymous.

And would you believe they did it - and answered honestly?

When we got together again as a group and revealed the answers, our group was like "Whoa - this is gonna stir some shit. We CANNOT reveal which sorority and fraternity said this stuff, right? Redact who said what."

 

As predicted, when I presented it to the class of 100 people (could never do that now) - they were right, it caused an uproar.

Because here were the answers from 6 most elite sororities and 6 fraternities  - and no, just like then, I'm not telling you which ones said what even now, only that this was at the University of Kentucky in 1989:

"What kind of person do you want in your sorority/fraternity?"

Sororities: "Pretty, fun" was the answer 5/6 times, as if they had a rubber stamp, regardless of sorority. 

The outlier said they were looking for socially conscious, smart women.

Fraternities: "Likes to party" all 6 times, but also "rich, fun, good looking, athletic."

"What kind of questions do you ask candidates during pledge week?"

Sororities: Mostly normal questions, but the standouts were:

"What does your dad do for a living?"

"Do you have designer clothing?"

I kid you not. 

With the exception of one sorority, who asked about social causes and charities and GPA.

"Would you accept someone that doesn't drink/party?"

Answers ranged from "Probably not" to "No" without exception.

"Would you accept someone overweight or unattractive?"

Answers ranged from "No" to "HELL no" to one standout:

"If they were a legacy or came from the right family, then yes."

"How much does intelligence play a role?"

They said there is a GPA they must uphold and half of both sororities and fraternities essentially said high achievers/smart members were the icing on the cake and made them look good.

And as already mentioned, the one sorority said GPA, social causes, and charity work was extremely important to them.

"Would you accept a person of color?"

Answers ranged from "No" to "HELL no" to "They have their own, make them go there" to one sad, coward who sad to one sad answer  that simply said "We say we would, and I would, yes -  but it will never happen unfortunately."

One standout sorority said "Yes, and we have. - if they can afford it"

"Would you accept someone Jewish?"

See above answers on race, the answers were exactly the same.

Would you accept someone who was gay?

You can imagine how well that one went over, about the same as race or religion answers - with the surprising exception of again, 1 sorority, who had one member openly gay already.

"Would you accept someone disabled?"

"No" to "It'd be hard for them to keep up with activities" to "Not unless they were already a brothers/sister before they were disabled."

So ... this went over like an anvil, of course. 

I barely got through the answers before the white greeks in the room went nuts.

The black greeks in the room just started laughing loudly, saying 'Yep, I knew it! That's why we don't even try. Fuck y'all"

Then the white greek men said we made these things up and demanded to know who said what.

Of course, I refused to give up my sources as if a journalist, as well as answering honestly that they were anonymous so I didn't know myself the actual individuals who filled these out, only the organization itself they were from.

I looked at my professor, who just looked around the room, then at me, with a smile on her face, winked, and then mouthed "keep going."

Then they accused us of writing them up ourselves, which we were prepared for.

Having redacted which sororities and fraternity they were from, we compared each of the surveys on the overhead with to our own handwriting with a dry erase pen on a whiteboard - live. 

Of course, it proved the handwritten answers were not written by anyone in our group.

I finished the presentation by saying this:

"Remember, the point of this experiment was NOT to bash Greeks - it was to find out if we had misjudged them without knowing them personally, because if so, then we're being exclusive hypocrites."

"Unfortunately, most proved our perception of you correct - with the exception of one sorority who surprised us and taught us not to throw the baby out with the bathwater."

In fact, I would pledge this one myself, if they would accept me, if I had the money, but I don't. And there's the other issue - how many are ruled out not because of who they are, but because they simply don't have the money?"

"If you don't like the answers your brothers and sisters gave, then maybe there's more self-improvement work to do - and in one case, having the courage to be more vocal about who you DO accept rather than who you don't, and proving it."

"Because there's not just one side to any of us - and nobody likes to be pigeonholed - so are you pigeonholing yourselves?

"Thank you for your time."

Then I stepped down to a standing ovation from the non-Greek, Jewish Greek, Black Greek students - and my professor.

The white Greeks booed, one even threw a wadded up piece of paper at me. 

Me, forcing a smile at them for a brief second, dripping with sweat and trembling, picked up my books and promptly just left the building. 😂

Interestingly, though, one of the fraternities invited me later to be in their "Women of UK" calendar - fully clothed, only for women who also had a high GP, the only non-Greek  invited A - which was sort of a weird compliment that they heard me, I guess - in their own misguided frat-boy way. 😂

Baby steps, right? 

(It was never released, though, because the frat ran out of money to mass produce them.)

And I was later invited to be on Student Government representing the College of Social Work - all Greek but me.

So the question is, would I still do it today?

It's probably more important than ever to do today, but I can't public speak if my life depended on it anymore lol. Too much trauma and drama since then!

And this time, I wouldn't be partially motivated to do the experiment out of my own insecurity or fear they wouldn't accept me, either, that I wasn't good enough. 

And if somebody asked me the question, or told me they asked the question "What does your dad do?" and asked if I had designer clothing, instead of feeling "less than" about myself, I'd probably tell them to go F themselves, IN their designer clothing. 😂 

And if I did somehow manage to remember how to public speak without soiling myself, I'd like to think I'd not leave the room in a tremble, I'd be a little bit more confident in my findings, and remember my wit and clap back in a funny way.

But am I still the sort of person who likes to challenge labels and stereotypes and social norms, as well as challenge MYSELF with any biases that I may have - groups such as Greeks, or I daresay, Republicans?

Yes - because people are individuals and lumping them all into one category is just as unfair. 

(I might argue that there's a big difference  between racism and bigotry VS. bias against groups who have a choice in membership), 

However, it was also interesting to note that sometimes, that first perception is the correct one, too - but at least I gave them a chance to prove otherwise, right?

And I always will.

But I have learned how many chances to give since then, too, regardless of what group the are a part of.

As Maya Angelou said, "If someone tells you who they really are, believe them."

Amen.

 

Pedro Pascal ... and PUPPIES!

 

These BuzzFeed celebrity interviews with adoptable puppies are always adorable, but how much do we love this one with our Pedro?

My husband told everyone at work about seeing The Mandalorian and Grogu, and then suddenly, all the ladies circled him like a wolf pack, saying how much they love Pedro! 😂

He said "Ladies, I hate to disappoint you, but his helmet doesn't come off until way into the movie, and then not for very long. Someones removes it."

And they were like "Wait, what? His helmet comes off? Yay! But did he have to kill everyone later who saw him without it?"

The answer to that is see the movie.

(Hint: Yes.)

IMAX Theater, Reclining Seats, Big Buttered Popcorn, and A Grogu ICEE? Check, Check, Check and Check!

 (Edited/content added, 5/25/2026)

Ahhh :)

(The two shadows are my feet up in the reclining chairs, of course.)

So what's a Grogu ICEE?

It's the green thing on the right, Grogu-colored.

It's a cherry-and-lime ICEE - and it's was actually really good, better than you think it would be!

We also bought a giant tub of extra-butter popcorn, pretzels, pop, candy - behaving as if we were kids again - cholesterol and A1c be damned!

The guy waiting on us to get this food was super fun, and he actually gave us some stuff free because we made him laugh with our silliness and telling him we were pretending we were kids going to see a movie again.

He bragged to us that he still has the original Star Wars Trilogy originally on VHS.

I said that's great, but I saw the original Star Wars Trilogy when they came out at the theaters, I win! 😂

I told him that my older sister took me to the first one at the Kenwood Theaters in Cincinnati, OH, in 1977, when I was 8 years old, and that my friend (Jacky) and I, flew down the aisle of a fully-packed theater after a bathroom trip, with our arms spread out like X-wing fighters, making a "vroooom" sound, to which my older sister hid her face, pretended not to know us, and vowed never to take me to a movie again. 😂

But I promised him that I would refrain from doing so, this go-round!

As for this one, Star Wars: The Mandalorian and Grogu?

LOVED IT!

Well, mostly loved it - just a tad predictable, as it's a Disney kid-friendly Star Wars movie.

I also didn't like the fact that he told Grogu to heel like a dog, though he's his adopted son?

And there were some CGI characters with exaggerated racial features again, like in the Phantom Menace (black and Asian).

Except they were paired with different accents this time, in apparent attempt to seem less so?

Not sure why George Lucas does that or approves that in some movies, especially considering his wife is black?

So in the last big-screen movies, The Force Awakens, The Last Jedi, and The Rise of Skywalker, we have actual human characters of different races fighting the empire, and the aliens look like aliens.

But this time, we're back to CGI or Muppets with exaggerated human racial features as aliens again?

Alllrighty.

Well, at least they're usually good-guy characters, fighting for the rebellion/New Republic - so maybe he's trying to say aliens come in all colors, shapes and sizes, too?

And yet still, it just comes off as ... well, somewhat racist ... as if people who look differently than white people are aliens. 

Otherwise, I LOVED it - especially the fight-pit scenes!

So ... Mando/Din fights like a Jedi, he's almost psychic about anticipating his opponents' next moves.

I mean, I know Mandalorians are trained fighters and it's a sort of meditative religion - but he's especially good at it.

So Mando/Din is an orphan right?

Hmm.

It wouldn't surprise me at all of Mando/Din actually has The Force but doesn't realize it.

If that is revealed, you heard it first here, Ladies and Gents!

And, of course, I love it when Grogu is onscreen, it just makes me melt and smile, so adorable, hee hee!

He's grown just a little bit physically, as is his power, which makes it all the more puzzling why Mando/Din Djarin tells him to "Heel" like a dog, considering he's essentially his adopted son.

And this is a baby Yoda we're talking about -  who one day will be smarter, more sophisticated, and has the force innately - and can whup evil ass better than Mando even thought of?

But alrighty, we shan't dwell.

Their relationship is the thing, right?

And of course y'all know how much I love Pedro Pascal (helmet on almost entirely through the movie, though).

Plus Sigourney's in it!

About damn time!?!

And guess what?

She's a pilot and we get to see her fly and kick butt again!

Of COURSE for the rebellion/New Republic, who else would she fight for?

Yayyyyy!

Had a great time!!!

The Colbert Questionnaire, The Mandalorian and Grogu ...

It has been pouring rain for a few days, here, and it will continue this holiday weekend, so we've needed to adjust plans for indoor activities.

I have been watching the lead-up shows to the Colbert finale, which honestly, I enjoyed MUCH better!

It was Stephen's turn to sit in the hot-seat of the "Colbert Questionnaire" and be asked the questions by a bevy of celebrity guests from Billy Crystal to Robert DeNiro to Weird Al Yankovic, and from his wife, Evie.  😊

(Someone told me Michelle Obama was one of the questioners, but that is not the case.)

MUCH more genuinely funny, and also a bit sentimental.

Again, laughter through tears is my favorite emotion.

I saw a bit more of what I felt was missing from the finale, Stephen's ability to connect almost empathically with his audience, and the jokes and laughter didn't feel as forced, they felt more genuine again. 

Unlike other late-night talk show hosts, Stephen has an ability to assess and adjust his tone to the audience's mood, that night, whereas other talk-show hosts don't care, they just keep on with whatever spiel they have planned. 

That's sort of what we saw in the finale, IMO, but I guess Stephen went out the way he wanted to regardless for a change, which I get.

(Except I do still miss seeing a "best moments" montage, but that's okay, YouTube has done it for us.)

Otherwise, we are going to see my Pedro AND Sigourney Weaver AND Grogu in "Star Wars: The Mandalorian and Grogu" later today!!!!

I'm digging the old-school style movie poster, by the way.

And Memorial Day used to be the kickoff to blockbuster movie summers, a trend that kind of faded away during the 2010s, so I'm glad to see its return, I hope?

I know there's streaming now,  but going to the actual theater to see a movie used to be an event, especially from Memorial Day on, back in the day. 

Thus, I am SUPER excited for a multitude of reasons - one of them being this is the first time I've stepped foot in an actual movie theater since before COVID, no joke. 

Partly because it's cheaper to stream and partly because though I'm fully vaccinated, much of my state of Kentucky is NOT - and having had COVID despite being vaccinated - albeit milder - I still say "No, thank you," I would not care to have it again..)

Now, I wanted to see it at the Kentucky Theater - a classic, marqueed, Art Deco-style theater built in 1921 in downtown Lexington.

But alas, they're not showing it there yet. 

Thus, we're doing it IMAX, large popcorn with extra butter, ICEES, ALL of that - pretending we're carefree kids again for a couple of hours.

I'll let you know how it is?

Off to the movies!!!

(UPDATED) This Is The Way Colbert Will End ...

... not with a bang OR a whimper.

 

(Edited/Updated)

Though the press is calling it a "Cancelebration" - I guess it didn't feel like that to me, with the exception of the very end?

Instead, it was surprisingly "let's pretend it's business as usual," only many jokes seemed forced and ill-timed, although there were a few funny moments. 

There was much of everyone trying desperately to force us to focus on joy and laughter, as they were desperately trying to convince us they were.

It felt more like "We're all going to laugh and be happy anyway, dammit!" 😂

Also, no impromptu, impassioned, poetic homilies that Colbert is famous for - that ability to connect with his audiences almost empathically (except the very beginning speech).

Unlike other late-night hosts, he could assess and adjust to his audience's mood almost instantaneously, whereas other talk-show hosts didn't care, they just keep on with their spiel, whether jokes landed well or not, that night.

But not tonight, which I sort of get, go out on his terms.

But almost no zingers aimed at Trump on the way out, or at least directly by name, which surprised me, by the fearless man who stood up to abuse of power and hypocrisy from Day One in his career.

Don't get me wrong, I ADORE Stephen Colbert, I've written several glowing posts about him - I guess I just expected something else, tonight?

Now - the end with the Paul McCartney sing-a-long with "Hello, Goodbye"  was GREAT.

IMO, it was appropriate to have Paul McCartney as his last guest, because I'm not sure people realize this, but the show has been filmed in the Ed Sullivan theater for the last 33 years - and it is the same theater where the Beatles made their debut in America!

I'm also not sure people realize that there will be no show in the theater at all, anymore - at least at present.

The acoustic jam with Elvis Costello singing along "Jump Up" - with former bandleader Jon Baptiste joining in was also GREAT.

I also loved that Strike Force 5 (all the other late-night talk show hosts, who came on for a skit for support) - but their jokes didn't land that well. 

I guess it just felt like the real Stephen Colbert was already gone and somebody replaced him with some emotionless robot?!? 😂

In fact, people who'd never watched it before, watching his show for the first time tonight to see what the big deal was, were probably like "Big loss, Trump's right, this show isn't funny."

To those folks I say, "What you saw last night was NOT 'business as usual' for Stephen Colbert, despite him trying his damnedest to convince us it was. That was Stephen Colbert going through the motions, trying not make it sappy and sentimental or let Trump see his sadness."

It surprised me, actually, that the man normally so capable of being funny, intellectual, and spiritual - almost like a priest or minister at times - so articulate about describing what so many of us are feeling, then ending it with a punch line - somehow missed the mark tonight on giving his viewers and fans what they have loved and appreciated about him from the start.

What mark did he miss?

That almost empathic connection with us he's famous for - and maybe what we, his audience and fans needed to see tonight.

I get it -  "Never let them see you sweat/steal your joy" - but maybe we wanted to see the sentimental? 

Maybe WE needed the corny look-back montage at great shows past.

Maybe WE needed just one more impassioned, poetic homily from the Catholic-Sunday-school teacher side of him about freedom of speech and fighting for the soul of America

Maybe we needed to tear up with him for a split second, then laugh again.

(Because as Dolly Parton said in Steel Magnolias "laughter through tears is my favorite emotion." Both emotions are spontaneous and raw and authentic, reminding us of what it is to be human - the best parts.)

Or maybe all we really needed was one last fearless zinger aimed at Trump?

But there was little to none of any of the above at all.

I feel like his jokes would've landed better, tonight, had he allowed that authentic emotion to flow, the bittersweetness of it all, lrather than trying so hard not to seem sad or let Trump get to him.

It's like someone telling you at a funeral to be happy they're at peace now, you just want to punch them in the face because you're not ready for that yet! 😂

However, it's true it's NOT a funeral - Stephen is very much still alive and has projects in the works - it's just a sad situation.

It's especially sad - and scary - that a president can have this much power over the media - especially one that cradled "freedom of speech" as central to his campaign.

Guess he only meant the right to be a racist, homophobic "Christian" bully - and ESPECIALLY if it's not about HIM.

It's just not the way I expected Colbert to go out, or at least the way I hoped he go out.

I'm not sure what I expected, but it wasn't whatever or whoever that was tonight. 

Guess he went out the way he wanted to and dammit all?

Nevertheless, I think the world of Stephen Colbert, I truly do - I respect him completely for standing up to power, especially the way that he has.

And I wish he and Evie and the kids nothing but smooth sailing from now on.

I hope Trump will just go away now - not just from whining about late-night talk show hosts and trying to get them fired because they make jokes about him, but in general, please.

Amen?

__________________________

PS - I'm canceling Paramount this weekend, right after I watch the Season Finale of Ghosts.

Oddly enough, I just read where the #1 show on CBS/Paramount and one of my favorites - Ghosts - is being moved to midseason January 2027, with the exception of the Halloween and Christmas specials.

CBS claims it is doing so to make room for more "family-friendly "Thursday night comedies.

Oh, piss off, CBS - there's nothing NOT family friendly about Ghosts, it's just that one of the ghosts came out as gay.

You know what I think the Ghosts casts and crew should do?

Move Ghosts to another network!!!

Because Ghosts and Colbert were literally 2 of the only 3 reasons I watched CBS anyway (the 3rd being CBS Sunday Morning).

Dean's List Badge!

 

Got on the Dean's List today - 4.0 for the semester -  yayyyy! 😊

My program (Certified Oncology Data Specialist) is only offered at the Clermont Campus at the University of Cincinnati.

"The MYTH of Southern Charm" - PBS Documentary

 

 

(Though it just dropped on PBS a few days ago, this video is the full documentary. Not sure how long it will last on YouTube, but it's here for now.)

I highly recommend this documentary that I'm watching, I'm about three-quarters of the way through it.

It's about the mecca for white Boomers on river cruises - Natchez, Mississippi 😂

Now, though I have often wanted to take a riverboat like the Belle of Louisville - the oldest riverboat still in operation in America - the longer trips down the Ohio to the Mississippi always either stop at or end in Natchez, Mississippi and have plantation tours. 

Um ... no, thank you.

And it's NOT because I am at all afraid of being confronted with our country's actual dark history - it's because they ONLY focus on the beauty and pretend the darkness wasn't there, that it didn't happen.

I can't admire finery knowing it was all obtained via human trafficking and slavery - sorry. 

I can't sit there and have mint juleps and cookies on the veranda on the same spot where thousands of people's families were ripped apart, where they were beaten, raped, tortured, and murdered.

It's beyond disrespectful, it's disgusting.

It's like having a tea party at Auschwitz and admiring the handiwork of the iron gates, just - NO.

So the film starts with just that, the beauty of the old antebellum homes and their eccentric owners, the decadent finery, often hosted by descendents of the original families - happy, funny, sunny people with juleps and tea and cookies and bustled skirts for home tours and carriages, white and black people laughing and talking together as if friends.

And yet not everything is what it seems. 

The longer you stick around, reality sets in, in a slow burn - and yet still you are jarred by it when it happens.

Not so much by the actual history, which we already know the horrors of, built on the backs of slaves - but the attitudes of people in the South still today, which of course you won't see at first and may never see unless you're family or inner social circle.

And that is because Southerners have turned duplicity and sincere-sounding inauthenticity into an art form.

And they know what they're saying is wrong and reveals their true nasty nature, or they'd say it in "polite company" as well.

It's bad in Kentucky, but gets worse the further south you go.

And THAT is what is meant by the myth of Southern Charm.

So the first inkling we have is the famous Natchez Pilgrimage Garden Club Home Tour, which at first is fine.

Until a bunch of white people on the veranda sip their drinks and go on and on about forgetting their troubles and this country's troubles for awhile and escape to a happier time.

Happier time?

For whom?

And at what cost to human life?

Later, we see some members of the actual garden club, who have gathered at the home of the first black historical homeowner, just recently allowed in, Debbie Cosey, who bought the kitchen house and slave quarters still standing behind the main house (which isn't) and refurbished it to add to the tour of homes. 

These women say the dumbest shit I've ever heard, I swear. 

It's not expressly racist - it's just ignorant defense of their old "gentile" families.

Listening to them trying to justify their great-grandparents actions is just ... cringe.

Stuff like "I was told they were affectionate to their servants, but of course, that's no substitute for freedom."

???

That's like a backhanded compliment.

And servants?

Bitch, servants are paid - these were slaves - call them what you know your family did, and worse.

There WAS no such thing as a "benevolent master" in slavery, that's another fantasy myth.

Though some slaves were treated better than others (earlier New Orleans) - never forget the entire practice of slavery is based on treating other human beings as inferior livestock property, and that the entire system was built on the worst character flaws humanity has to offer - power abuse and greed.

And this nonsense being spewed out of the same foaming mouths whilst "defending" THEIR freedoms and THEIR rights not being infringed upon, who become infuriated if you so much as tell them they need to wear a mask in public places during a pandemic! 😂

And stuff like "Well, in 1860, when Lincoln gave the Emancipation Proclamation, they started paying them for their kitchen work."

????

What planet do you live on?

Debbie just puts her head down on the fireplace mantel. 

But you know what I'd say?

First, to Debbie ...

"Allow me to apologize on behalf of all white people that display their ignorance publicly and arrogantly. I got this bitch. Let me help educate her because she'll listen to it coming from another white woman first. Then you finish our education by filling in what I don't know, okay?" 

Then I'd say to Miss Sissy Prissy Butt, or whatever her stupid Southern Belle name is  ....

"Well, Miss ... Whatever ... you know what MY grandpappy  used to say?"

"If you shut your mouth, you might learn something." 

"Because not a word of what you just said is true. That's just something we white people tell ourselves to feel better about our family and country's history, because we don't want to face or handle the truth."

"No - they were NOT paid for work after the Emancipation Proclamation, nor even after the Civil War in the South. They were supposed to be - including being given 40 acres of land and a mule as lame compensation -  but they didn't even receive that." 

That is because after Lincoln was shot, his VP-turned-President, Andrew Johnson, turned out to be a closet Confederate and slavery sympathizer and effed up reconstruction on purpose and there was no enforcement."

"And if they caught them trying to go North or otherwise off the plantation after the war ended,  they'd be thrown in jail for 'vagrancy.' 

"In fact, they were not paid by white people in the South until the next century, and even then, not enough to live on until the Civil Rights Act of 1965, which to this day, they still find ways around."   

  "So it was either keep on doing what you were doing for free, because you had no other choice to eat, or sharecropping/tenant farming - meaning you could live on the land and pay your rent in crops, which was essentially the same thing as slavery, and actually resulted in great debt if the crops failed."

"Not to mention, the violence actually became even worse en masse, with Jim Crow laws now in effect - this was actually when the Ku Klux Klan was in its heyday."

"The only way any people of color had anything was through providing services within their own community or through churches or by selling crafts to white people through a white dealer who paid in pennies but charged hundreds.

"Now - Debbie, please continue - preach, girl - educate us."

And the funny, charming "Southern Gentleman," David Paul Garner, you see at the beginning -- the colorful owner of Choctaw Hall, an openly gay man who holds LGBTQ galas and proclaims "Most of these old homes are owned by gay men like us now."

So you think to yourself, "Okay, Natchez got a littttttle progressiveness going on there," right?

Wrong! 

About an hour later, you hear some of the worst racist stuff come out of his mouth like you wouldn't believe, including use of the N-word, which he only does with a small group later, after he puts the Southern charm away when the full tour leaves. 

Yet another example of the myth of Southern Charm.

So you're thinking ...

"DUDE!?! Do you imagine that as a gay white male, you're viewed by conservatives as being better than blacks because you're white and have money?

"Well, let me ask you this - do you see any white religious nuts standing outside THEIR houses yelling they're going to hell, like we saw outside your lavish LGBTQ parties? 

"No, you do not. Because unlike me, these nuts believe you have a choice in your lifestyle as opposed to people of color who have no choice in having dark skin. You're dreaming if you don't realize they actually view you as worse than black people. "

But the worst so far?

Gene, a muffler dealer that lives across the street from Forks in the Road, where the second largest slave market once stood. 

He will not sell his portion of the land to the state or federal government, to add it to the small national park to preserve it and tell the stories of what went on there.

Now at first - as most Southern conservatives do - he makes it sound rational, like a reasonable business decision.

He says "I'm not trying to be racist, but ..."

Of course, any time anyone starts a sentence like that, be prepared for usually the very next thing out of their mouth to be incredibly racist. 😂

But in this case, it wasn't - at first.

(Paraphrasing) "It's just government won't offer me enough money for the land and people just don't want that kind of reminder of so much darkness, they come here for the beauty. It will hurt local business."

Okay, sounds like a pure business decision, right? 

Oh, but wait. 

And I might argue anyway that some of us WANT to know the FULL history, the good and bad, but I understand the business concern. 

Now, in case you weren't aware, there is also no such thing as  "Southern gentlemen," and anyone that tells you they are is actually the worst sort of men.

In fact, old Southern conservative men are the trickiest and the most skilled at faux Southern charm, you see.

They dance around issues with polite rhetoric that sounds so rational and plausible that for a second, you listen, thinking you're being fair, listening to the other side of things.

Then later, of course - when off camera, when polite company leaves -  or in this case, later, when he's been drinking -  THEN you hear the REAL racist story come out of his mouth.

And again, they KNOW it's horrible or they'd say it out loud in front of God and everybody from the get-go! 😂

So IMO, if you ever really want to know what people really think, get them drunk - because being drunk doesn't make you say things you don't really think - it just makes things you really think easier to say.

So Tracy or "Rev" (he's also a pastor) and local tour guide - who is black - brings his tour group of white people to the spot.

Now, Rev is very fair, he tells both the good and the bad history of Natchez.

For instance, he reports accurately that only 5% of white people in the South actually owned slaves. 

(FYI, what he doesn't say is, this was likely not based on morality, but based on finances - most white people would've owned them if they could afford the trade - and we know that because they fought for the Confederacy and voted for slavery.)

After letting them view the finery, he also brings his all-white tourists to Forks in the Road and gives the not-so-pretty side of things for people of color and those living poverty even still today.

Interestingly, his tour business is booming - and it's mostly white conservatives, actually - and he's very articulate, very entertaining, very funny, and very kind. Sometimes they try to start an argument, but he just lets them speak, then when they've wound down, asks if he can counter, very politely. 

They seem amazed that this black man is intelligent, articulate, and not wanting to fight them, proving they clearly don't know any black men in real life, only the ones that make the news 😂

At one point, he does say "Speak your mind, please, go ahead, talking it out is at the root of making things better. Plus it's probably the only time you'll engage with an articulate black man lol." 

Oooh, a well-executed polite Southern burn! 😂

So he's giving his tour speech and Gene, the Muffler Idiot, walks about halfway over across the street and Tracy goes "Hey, Gene!"

And drunk Gene goes "That black boy lies to you, don't listen to him!"

Pretty sure he's not lying - Gene just wishes he was. 

And that, Ladies and Gentlemen, is the "myth" of Southern Charm.

There is one shining beam of hope in this documentary, though Tracey - the Southern Belle greeter in the thumbnail of the video?

Not Tracy the male tour guide, different Tracey.

She starts out all Trumpified, grew up poor, married well, happily patriotic - and then her husband divorces her and she signed a prenup - and is left with nothing.

She takes the tour offered by Rev Tracy, the tour guide - and is forever changed by it. After her own misfortune, she is more open to hearing the darker side of history - the history of the other side of things that Natchez doesn't like to tell, or at least doesn't want to focus on. 

So I'm turning it on again now, forcing myself to watch it - not in white fragility of the reality of black experience in America, but because of the things that come out of other white people's ignorant mouths still today is just horrifying.

I think the Forks Park Ranger at the current small site at Forks in the Road says it best (paraphrasing): "I think with most, it's less about willful ignorance and intending to be racist and more about this being the only history they were taught, so it's like you're asking them to flip their whole belief system on its head, which is too threatening to the psyche, despite it being truth - about their country, their community, even they're own family. They need to believe - and keep on believing - that their family experience was the way it was for everybody. They need to stay in denial because the alternative is too scary."

Yeah - and I'm sure the Nazis did the same thing.

Sorry it's unpleasant - but this is reality.

It's the full complete history, flaws and all.

And this country will not get better - it will never heal properly - until we make ourselves look at it - and I mean, really look at it - and deal with it appropriately instead of pretending it didn't happen or is "in the past." 

Nothing painful will ever truly heal until it's faced head on and dealt with. 

Copy of State Representative (D) Adrielle Camuel's Whistleblower Letter to Governor Beshear (D) and the Kentucky Department of Education

 

I knew this was coming and knew what it said beforehand, but Representative Adriel Camuel - who not only works at Central Office at FCPS, but is also a Democrat State Representative - dropped THIS bombshell to the state, signed by fellow Dem representatives, with a copy of the letter on FB. For the history of this situation, read earlier posts.

(There aren't many of us Dems in the State House of Representatives, but there are a few.)

Essentially, what you need to know is that these are Dems calling out one of their own in charge (something MAGA could take a page from).

What you also need to know again is that we Democrats welcomed with open arms the first black, openly LGBTQ superintendent of Fayette County Public Schools and initially were overjoyed with Liggins.

We initially attributed any backlash to racism and homophobia.

That is until we saw proof that extravagant purchases had been made, unqualified cronyism was rampant (curiously for MAGA people, mostly white), and as Adriel says in the letter, shifting narratives of blame, lack of transparency, putting on leave or firing any whistleblowers - and worst of all, stating that the backlash was political rather than true concern for the budget.

All I can say is, this is NOT political  - and that is what Democratic House Representative Adrielle Camuel is trying to say, here.

Basically, Superintendent Liggins - as personable and charismatic as he is in person - is essentially the black LGBTQ version of Trump, or is at least playing by Trump's playbook - and we're not having it in our party or in our public schools

That sort of behavior should never be turned a blind eye to for the sake of political agendas nor tolerated by ANY political party.

Two wrongs do not make a right - stooping to Trump tactics to stay on top is NOT okay.

Also with close friend, Tyler Murphy, the school board Chairman, enabling the spending with his rubber stamp approval on everything isn't helping.

So today, the Lexington Herald Leader reported that Governor Beshear and KDE (Kentucky Department of Education) had a private meeting with Superintendent Demetrus Liggins, the Chairman of the School Board, Tyler Murphy (tight with Liggins), and financial consultant Kyna Koch (who has consulted on and off since 2008, and yet is blaming others before the current administration for this current budget crisis).

The paper makes no mention of Adriel's letter, but it does say say Liggins and Murphy called for the meeting themselves (but curiously, we know it was within 24 hours after Adriel published the public letter). 😉

Now - Valarie Honeycutt Spears is one hell of a truly objective, old-school journalist - meaning there's no opinion, no tone, just facts she can prove and quotes of things officials told her, and not just "sources say," but their names and positions.

When you read her articles, you cannot tell what she believes herself, and she is very careful to attribute exactly who and where the information came from, making no claims about truthfulness, just what they told her.

I don't think people realize what a remarkable feat that is in journalism, especially in this day and age -  I'd never make it 😂

Thus, first of all, you need to know that it was way more than 115 people fired as she was told  - try over 200 people.

And though FCPS initially wrote "administration" in the initial layoff announcement email, misleading people to think it was leadership, it was actually low-paying administrative support staff, which they're now finally admitting.

Also initially, there were no cuts to high-level executive staff or to their salaries - until protests began - and they've now taken a 10% pay cut including Liggins.

Also, they asked for a $110 million-dollar loan this week to save the school. 

I can't say much more than what is printed publicly, but let's just say after this letter - though Adrielle's head was initially saved from the chopping block, it was hinted to her this week after that letter that it wouldn't be.

UNTIL - someone mentioned to leadership "Um ... you don't want to do that to a state rep for blowing the whistle now, too. That would turn out very, very bad for you."

Thus, Adriel is still there -  for now.

Regardless, the state meeting was private, and all the article says is that Liggins, Murphy, and Koch pledged more transparency to Governor Beshear, and KDE wanted the public to know that they are NOT "taking over the school" - they are giving FCPS leadership a chance to turn it around - BUT - would now be closely monitoring FCPS, who would be reporting to them regularly.

PS x2 - Here's The NYT News Article On The Canvas Cyberattack (So You Know I'm Not Making This Up)

 *THIS SITUATION HAS BEEN SEMI-RESOLVED - ENOUGH TO ATTEND CLASSES ON MONDAY*

I have updated the post below, but the cyberattack is on Canvas - which is the online learning platform most college campuses use (and some high schools) - made national headlines - this one from the NYT.

Of course, the Canvas platform is what we use for classes, set to resume on Monday, of course it is.

So ... God, Universe, whatever?

When I said "Come hell or high water, this time, I'm going to finish" - that was NOT an invitation to do your worst! 😂

Sigh -  if you don't laugh, you'll cry, right? 

PS - Now, Would You Believe THIS? Major Cyberattack, Every College Campus Using Canvas for Remote Learning (UPDATED)

 *THIS SITUATION HAS BEEN SEMI-RESOLVED - ENOUGH TO ATTEND CLASSES ON MONDAY*

 

This came from UC's CIO this morning ...

Of course, Canvas is program we use to take online classes, which were supposed to resume on Monday, but likely won't because of the cyberattack, which they say they don't know a timeframe for resolution.

It's not JUST us, it's every college campus that uses Canvas for remote learning, which is in the millions.

I swear to goodness, it feels like something beyond my control is always in the way from me finishing my education, family illness, hurricanes, cyberattacks, Trump's Big BS financial aid bill  - you name it.

But you know what I say to that?

I said I was finishing this time, come hell or high water, but that was NOT an invitation.

So FU, UC Canvas cyberattacks. 

FU Trump and your Big Beautiful Bill of BS, stripping down money for education and funnelling it towards pet war projects like Iran.  

Do your worst -  because in writing that post yesterday, I realized I've faced much worse - but this time, I will go around you and still get it down somehow, watch me! 😂

______________________________

Update - I just spoke with an advisor and learned that it IS ransomware - and it affects every college campus that uses Canvas.

However, none of our personal information is kept in Canvas, like our social security #, address, phone - nothing. 

Thus, the ransom holders threatened release of communication between students and faculty and we're like "Um ... go ahead?  It's all just forum discussions and submitted assignments anyway."

Regardless, students and faculty can still access it - just UC administration can't. 

Thus, we are advised to look for strange emails, etc., phishing for personal information.

I'll update here when we know more. 

"Big Beautiful Bill" and Major Student Loan Changes ...

As of July 1, 2026., Trump's "One Big Beautiful Bill" Act goes into effect.

First of all, that has got to be the dumbest, most Neanderthal name of a bill that has ever existed.

I mean, seriously, it's like a caveman named it - "Me. One. Big. Beautiful. HA."

You can see all the changes HERE.

Basically, if you're a traditional, full-time student, nothing much will change, unless you receive a scholarship - then you're automatically ineligible for grants. 

HOWEVER, if you're nontraditional - meaning you are older and/or half or part-time due to work or parenting, then you're in trouble - because your loans will be slashed by 50% - meaning your loan will either just meet, or be just short of, the cost of tuition.  No money left over for books, housing, food, child care - nada. 

So here's the issue - my accelerated program is only offered part time. 

That is because it's an accelerated program, each class has been about 25 hours of work per class, it's essentially like a second job. (This past session was the only time I had 2, and it was definitely 50+ hours of work.) 

Our advisors are scrambling to figure something out because most of the students in this program are nontraditional, meaning they work or have kids.

We are also looking at scholarships due to my 4.0 last semester in all 3 classes, and a 3.8 cumulative overall, but I am competing against young ones, so wish me luck? 

If you're a graduate student?

Even worse, and all I can say is - good luck - because it's bad - really, really bad. 🥲

Like I said, I am GOING to finish this time, come hell or high water!!!

The first time, I was blessed with a surprise baby girl. 😊

I went back when she was 2 and got a 4.0, but she acquired penicillin-resistant Strep pneumonia from daycare, resistant to initial antibiotics, requiring round-the-clock care for days and I had to drop.

(Aside - if nothing else to take away from this story I'm about to tell, take away that societal antibiotic overuse has led to antibiotic resistance.)

In fact, another child in that same daycare ultimately died from it, but I suspected very quickly the strain was resistant to antibiotics because she was worse after 2 days. Blisters in her throat, croupy cough, fever of 104, she was becoming lethargic.

I called the receptionist who wouldn't schedule a same-day appointment, believing this was a new viral infection rather than the same bacterial infection because "she's on antibiotics already."

I know that - I'm telling you this may be resistant, nothing has changed; in fact, it's worse. Her fever has never dropped, it's actually risen to 104 and she's becoming lethargic."

But she wouldn't listen and made the appointment for the next day.

At that time, I was afraid to speak up as I didn't trust myself after being gaslighted for so long (and bad things happened when I did) -  HOWEVER - I also happened to be taking a Microbiology class at UK at the time and I had coincidentally just learned about rising antibiotic resistance.

So I ran possible resistance by my professor to see if I was overreacting and this was just power of suggestion from what I'd just learned or lucky coincidence that we just studied it.

He said, "It's lucky coincidence, divine intervention, whatever you want to call it, but PUSH, Chrystal, this DOES sound like resistance! Tell them another child in her daycare is on life support! Chrystal - do you know how uncommon it is to get an A in my class before I curve the grades?  If I could change one thing for you, it would be to have more faith in yourself! GO, call back and demand to speak to the doctor now! And if they won't listen, go ahead and take her to the ER, because if it IS resistance, she'll become septic soon!"

So I called and probably acted like a Karen, demanding to speak to the actual doctor immediately.

Hey - if there's one time you could and should act like a Karen, it's when  your child is super sick and the dang receptionist thinks she's a doctor and won't listen to you.

HOWEVER, not only did Dr. H listen to me and allow me to bring her in emergently to be examined -  confirming the symptoms were exactly the same only worse - but he also called the hospital and spoke to the doctors of the child on life support and spoke with the Infectious Disease doctors for antibiotic suggestions.

He had to inject her with large-bore needle with a slow push full of high-dose Augmentin (which is still penicillin, but with a special enzyme that breaks down resistant bacterial cell barriers) and steroids.

I remember silent tears rolling down my face, which I didn't even notice at first because I was comforting her when they injected her with that big needle with a slow push, telling her it will hurt for a second, but make her better, wait and see ... that I was right here, look at me, just look at Mommy, she can have whatever she wants to eat or do whatever she wants to do afterwards when she feels better.

I told them to count to 3, and I started singing "Baby Mine" while they counted, which was her song, looking at her, smiling with tears streaming down my face apparently, my arms around her, and she looked straight in my eyes when he injected her and she blinked, clenched her little fists, then let out a loud cry during, but she didn't cry afterwards. I think it's because we had prepared her that it would be over in a minute, but it will make her better, and I think that helped. It always helps to look forward.

And of course, L showered her with candy and stickers immediately, too, giving her a choice as distraction - distraction always helps. 😂

I'm tearing up now, just thinking about that day, aren't I a cornball?

Then unexpectedly afterwards, Dr. H, and his nurse, L, hugged me and then said "We know you don't have a lot of support and you doubt yourself, but you shouldn't because you are SUCH an excellent mom! In fact, you're one of our favorites! Just thought you probably don't hear that enough and felt it was a good time to tell you that"

Well, that felt good - and they're right, I didn't hear that much 😂 -  and advised watching her literally round the clock for signs of meningitis or sepsis.

(He also gave the receptionist a good scolding for playing doctor hehehe.)

Then he told me she would need to be watched round the clock for at least 48 hours to watch for signs of sepsis or meningitis.

So I literally stayed up for 48 hours straight, on round-the-clock!

BUT - her fever came down in 48 hours, and it took about a week for full recovery, but no meningitis, no sepsis - we caught it just in time!

Dr. H and L - the best pediatrician and nurse in the world, hands down.

So that is why I dropped school, but I am grateful to both Dr. H (best pediatrician in the world, now retired) and Dr. M (Microbiology professor at UK) for listening to me and encouraging me!!!! 😊

(Dr. M said he regretted my having to leave, but understood, and said he hoped to see me back one day. He was in hopes I'd go into Microbiology 😂 Of course, that didn't happen and I believe he's retired now, too, but still very grateful)

So the second attempt at school (or technically the third) was in Florida in 2004/05, but we had 3 hurricanes in Pensacola that year - Ivan, Dennis, and Katrina.

I had a 4.0, but considering the windows were blown out of certain buildings of the school -  and the intact buildings were being used for shelter for New Orleans Katrina victims - there WAS no school to go to for a while and it would be months for repairs.

So with the town in tatters, unable to work for that hospital, either, I moved back her and continued working for my side contract job (until they outsourced to India that next year).

Most importantly, I divorced my ex, who I consider a 4th hurricane. 😂

So it was a combination of my poor choices and me not being the luckiest person in the world.

Hopefully, I've learned from my poor choices, but I couldn't do much about other things beyond my control, like antibiotic-resistant child illness or hurricanes or other hurdles like the OBBA.

But one thing I am good at is - resourcefulness.

You learn to be as a single mom- "How can I stretch a dollar, how can I shift money to be used for this instead of that because it's due sooner, how can I get what we need, and fast?

There IS no savings as a single mom unless you have that college degree, everything goes to basic stuff.

Even if you can save a little, say you live with a parent or grandparent for a while, illness or injury or something needed for school will eat it.

So you exhaust all options - sometimes to no avail, but sometimes a way is made.

I'm determined and hopeful, though, like I said, one thing I'm good at is being resourceful - and I have the best advisors in the world - seriously, they are going to bat for us - not just me, everyone - but they are extremely supportive and I am grateful! 😊