Happy INDEPENDENCE Day/250th Birthday America - Plus Miss Americana Got Married!

 

No pictures because I only have a few minutes - plus they're everywhere - but Taylor Swift, married the man who has wanted to marry her since high school, Kansas City Chiefs tight end, Travis Kelce!

I saw an old interview with him when he was in college saying he knew what she was looking for, how others let her down, and said he's her man, he's exactly what she's been looking for, and wanted to marry her someday - then pursued her until she finally relented, and then she couldn't help herself. 😂

I LOVE this couple!

(Okay, his temper on the field worries me a bit, but as long as he keeps it on the field/can channel his aggression where it belongs, then I'll stop worrying for her  😂)

Don't be fooled - as of the moment this was written, we have no official pictures of either the actual wedding  NOR the thing everyone is waiting to see, her wedding dress -  - and we probably won't until after today (July 4th).

Because don't forget, in addition to being America's songwriter, she is a brilliant marketer - so give it time, folks - she will plop those pics down time it just right, right pictures at the right time.

On that note, people saying she timed it to "upstage" America's birthday?

Shut up - when else would Miss Americana get married?

Secondly, do you really want to get into a conversation about people making America's birthday about themselves, Trumpers? 

Because that conversation will not end well for you. 😂

Also, she didn't.

She never announced it, marketed it, or did a press tour - she just quietly booked Madison Square Garden - which of course, you can't do without it leaking.

Lastly,  don't forget, this is likely the only time of year you could book MSG because it's off season for almost all sports except soccer and boxing - with the latter being the only one she had to contend with, but of course if Taylor Swift calls you up and wants to book her weeding their, they're gonna be like "Yes, Miss Americana, right away" 😂

We wish them the very best! 

And once again, though I'm feeling less patriotic than I used to due to our current administration -  Happy INDEPENDENCE Day! 

Door Dashing Tips

 

So I've only been dashing for not quite 2 weeks as a trial, just to see if it's feasible. 

I watched a few videos from experienced dashers before I started - and they really helped!

Some tips work better for certain areas, but after following them, I am making about $80 tp $90 bucks in 3 hours!

Also, I made this with food delivery only - no grocery shopping OR delivering alcohol.

Because I don't want to deliver to underage kids with fake IDs or angry drunks, especially THIS week! 😂

Nor do I want to be in a situation where the store is out of whatever they wanted, you try to contact the customer for substitutions and they won't answer their messages, etc. Yes, you can make more doing these, but things can also go wrong more easily.

My Tips Thus Far Are:

1) Sit your car in a parking lot very near the most expensive restaurants in the busiest zone.

 

This is one I learned on my own.

It's not enough to simply BE in the busiest zone somewhere, your car/phone needs to be in close proximity to the restaurants you want to deliver from.

 

2)  Don't worry about your acceptance rate -  you do you - never take anything less than 1 dollar per mile.

          

The above includes "stacked" orders or more than one order. These are usually stacked because when they were single offers, they were so low that no one took them, so they stacked them on with another order from a nearby restaurant to make your tip seems higher. (Not always - sometimes it's just because it's the same restaurant.)

        

3) Even if the offer is $20 bucks for a 10-mile trip, consider the traffic and route, how much time that will take and how many other orders you might be losing, gas prices, and the wear and tear on your car - so it may not be worth it.  If orders are slow, then take it - if not, it's a maybe or a pass.

 

4) Being on time and pleasing the customer is key - so always grab extra straws and napkins - always. They may tell you they're in the sealed bag, but better safe than sorry. 

You cannot be dropped from Door Dash for lower acceptance rate, but you definitely can for lateness/poor service!

 

5) Dash even in unpleasant weather, but not BAD weather, be safe -  you will make more this way - less dashers and more people ordering in. 

(This current heat wave is actually of benefit. Just make sure you have good A/C and heat, good windshield wipers, and good tires!)

 

6) Unless you have great eyesight at night, don't go after dark  - you don't want to be creeping around someone's  yard with a flashlight trying to figure that out! 😂

FOR WOMEN:

6) Don't go after dark - period - unless you have a guy with you.

7) t's a good idea to have a guy ride with you even during the day/afternoon, if you can, especially if delivering in less safe areas.

 

(Mark rides with me every time, he WANTS to. He's my GPS navigator and instructions-reader. It's sort of like our weird date night! 😂

Sometimes the app flips out or freezes and the customer can't see that you're on your way. Send a message or call and tell them that in advance. 

If someone tries to give you any shit - especially a man -  listen quietly first, then de-escalate using your customer service skills and explain that you are indeed on your way, there must be an app glitch. If they don't stop ranting, put your man on the phone and that ends that, immediately! 😂

Examples of orders NOT to take:

$6 for 8 miles.  

Nope, doesn't fit the minimum $1-per-mile rule and you are actually losing money, based on the time it will take and orders you could've taken, as well as gas money.

$11 for a stacked order going 9 miles. 

So $11 looks good at first, but remember, these is 2 separate orders at 2 different restaurants with 2 different customers. 

This is a maybe if things are slow, but otherwise, realize the time it takes to wait at some restaurants , the time it takes you to find their houses, AND the fact that as single orders, these would've been s were a single order, it would've been $3 for 5 miles and $8 for 4. The second one would've been worth it, but the first one was stacked for a reason - likely they didn't tip at all and DoorDash just paid you alone.

This one is an offer I received yesterday - $20 for 45 miles.

HELL no, you must be out your damn mind! 😂

If they gave me $100, I might do it, but otherwise, HELL no.

Also, I realize food is incredibly expensive and you have an extra delivery fee to pay - but if it it too hot for you to get up off your couch and drive down the road to get your own food, realize it is also hot for your dasher. Thus, if you want someone to deliver your food to you, then you need to pay for that service in tips!

(DoorDash now pays something for no tippers, but it's low, like $3, depending on distance though.)

On that note, use selective compassion.

Meaning if it's in a poorer area, I might still deliver at the dollar-per-mile rate exactly, both because I know they can't tip much and might have transportation issues.

Not always, though - sometimes poorer areas actually tip higher, believe it or not, likely being in the service industry themselves, but I always feel bad doing those with higher tips!

HOWEVER, this also happened ...

On my first day, I delivered a $4 for 4 miles McDonalds order to a poorer area, both because it was poorer and because I knew that a major road to that particular McDonalds was down to 1 lane and  I knew traffic was terrible and because it was still the dollar rule and I knew things must be difficult for them. 

(Of course, there were 2 McDonalds in that area they could've ordered from that would've made a difference, but no, it had to be this one.)

Thus, I took the highway and went in a back way for them, still standing in traffic for about 3 minutes extra on that road.

I messaged the customer and told them traffic was at a standstill on that half-closed road and might be just a tad late.

After I delivered it, I realized DoorDash alone had paid me, they  hadn't put in a tip from the beginning! 

I know this because the app automatically puts in a tip when you order and you can raise it or lower it at the time of order - so you have to manually put in zero for no tip.

And though you can't see what they tipped before delivery, you can tell if they've changed it after delivery, and they didn't - meaning they expected all that, with that road closure in this heat, for nothing - DoorDash alone paid me! 

Update: I just found out they also left my only bad review, which DoorDash alerted me they removed, without my even knowing or asking them to - and it was this customer. 

I usually have people raise my tips due to being ahead of time and friendliness.

So DoorDash reviewed the situation before I even knew about it and removed their review "due to circumstances beyond my control" - is that awesome?

Because DoorDash GPS can see if there was traffic pileup due to accidents or road closures, they can see if you communicated that to the customer (which I did), and most importantly, there was another McDonald's 2 miles down the road that would've been easier to access due to the road closure. 

See, right there - they actually had a car right out in front and lived close - they just didn't want to get in the car themselves on a 98-degree hot day during rush hour on a road that they knew was down to 1 lane themselves - then got mad it was 3 minutes late, when they didn't tip from the beginning anyway!

Nope. Thus, practicing selective compassion - still taking care of myself, too. 

This reminded me of waiting tables as a side gig in the last recession.

In America, when actually waiting tables, gratuity is not included and thus the hourly wage is still only $2.15 an hour; thus, servers depend on their tips to pay their bills.

So in 2009, this family came in and spent $200 on a meal, asked for refills every 5 minutes, their kids dropped saliva-ridden crackers all over the floor, and they sat at the table for 3 hours.

When I collected their credit-card receipt, there was literally a hand-written note that said "Sorry, times are tight - can't tip 😦

I mean, they literally drew the sad face on it!

I'm thinking "Takeout next time, maybe? McDonalds, maybe? Or at least clean up after your kids and don't ask for 27 refills? Maybe just stay an hour so my entire shift isn't now gone?"

But I did not.

And THAT story reminded me of another from my college days, waiting tables.

Nobody wanted to work Sundays, because Sundays were the very worst when waiting tables -  the after-church people.

Not only did they not tip well, but they'd often leave you a bible tract in lieu of a tip that only looked like a $20 bill.

Instead, it had John 3;16 on the back, along with a tagline that said "I'm giving you something more valuable than a tip, I'm saving your soul. How much is your soul worth?"

Okay - I love Jesus and all, but he's not paying my rent.

AND if I wasn't already a Christian, I probably wouldn't want to be come one after you did that! 😂

One time, my friend, Jenny - who was both bold and hilarious, she should've done standup - ran after them and said "Sir? I think you forgot this on the table? Here you go - have a blessed day?"

😂😂😂

Fellow Christians?

It's this sort of behavior that causes people to turn away from Christ and the church - and then you wonder why or worse, blame them, instead of yourselves and your own behavior turning people off.

Back to DoorDash, at least they pay you more than 2.15 an hour because of gas money.

Thus, my overall advice thus far is, be selective, you do you - what's best for you, your gas mileage, and your car.

Man, I wish there'd been DoorDash during the last recession, things would've turned out a LOT differently!

PS - Gooooooaaaal! That's A Win!

 

From my brother-in-law's phone  - the second goal for Spain yesterday, who went on to score a third and win ...

So not only does he get to go, but he gets to witness a goal at the World Cup by his favorite team right in front of him! 😂

I'm pretty sure my brother-in-law is the luckiest man in the world, right? 🙂

My Baller BIL and Family at the Spain VS. Austria FIFA World Cup Game in LA Today ...

My Baller Brother-in-Law strikes again! 

In LA with his his family to watch the Spain VS. Austria game today.

Clearly, all Spain fans. 😂

Me too, less about soccer and more about the country, though, although that may be "unpatriotic" of me to say right now. 

In fact, I have requested that they ask the team if they can take us back home with them!  😂

Think they will? 😜

OBBBA and Financial Aid Cuts

 

For the history of this situation many students are finding themselves in, read THIS POST.

Essentially, as a result of Trump's Big Beautiful Bill of Bullsh*t, if you are going to school half or part time, you will lose most of your financial aid.

Of course, my particular program is only offered part time, so this affects me.

Thus, I have begun Door Dashing for extra cash.

Now - here's the thing - if you're going to restrict it, shouldn't GPA be taken into consideration?

Because  the way financial aid currently is - and has always been - is financial need only - in the form of grants and loans, which many don't earn enough to pay back even with degrees, as we all know from the news. 

And it should be based on financial need  - to a point.

Because the current rules are, you will lose your financial aid if your GPA is below a 2.0 - HOWEVER - you gain nothing if you have a 4.0 cumulative GPA like me, other than continuation

In fact, the amount can even be a lowered based on what you've already used in your lifetime - too bad for you if you had to drop due to work, illness, had a baby, etc. 

So basically, someone barely passing can get the same or even greater financial aid than me, getting a 4.0 GPA.

There is no incentive to perform well with financial aid other than to put your GPA on your resume?

That just doesn't make any sense to me.

Because if you're at a job and you perform well, you'd get raises or promotions, right?

It seems to me you've proven you'll earn your keep, and shouldn't that be taken into consideration?

Also, it's NOT your actual current financial need - because it's limited over how much you've already used. 

So if your job has been outsourced or is obsolete now with AI or other technology, such that you're in dire straits financially again - too bad for you, trying to get trained to do something else, you already used some the first go 'round.

What a messed up education funding system we have in America.

Yes, there are scholarships for merit around - with about 30K people applying for each one, and nobody's going to give one to my old ass  😂

So we Door Dash. I actually like it, can work anytime, and have learned which ones to take and not take, etc., where to sit for the best orders, and get plenty of exercise.

Hey, I've had worse obstacles to overcome, and I though I wouldn't say I overcame them, I found away around them, albeit not gracefully! 

And this, too, shall pass. 😊

Otherwise, just finished up all assignments for the week and ready to Door Dash and have a little fun (once it cools down), so Happy INDEPENDENCE Day!

American History Liberty Lesson: The Iron-Jawed Angels

 

"STAND" by sculptor  Barbara Grygutis - Lexington, Kentucky, unveiled in 2020

In line with my post below, we continue with discussion of the true definition of freedom and liberty, as opposed to current, falsely entitled belief, as part of a series ahead of Independence Day. 

(I call it Independence Day intentionally instead of the 4th of July because Independence Day is about the right to dissent, resist, criticize, and peacefully protest the government and those in power  - and it is built in to the American fabric since this country's inception.)

In fact, one might say it is unpatriotic and anti-American NOT to do so when you feel strongly. 

HOWEVER - don't get it twisted - because again, freedom and liberty aren't just about your individual rights - freedom and liberty are about equal rights for everyone in society, including the right for the rest of society to be protected from you.

Freedom and liberty are about having the right to vote and have a voice (even in dissent), the right to work and be paid, and in extreme cases, simply the right to exist in a society despite being different in some way or a minority - regardless of your gender, race, religion, sexual orientation, physical or financial status, or political party - without being harrassed, imprisoned, enslaved, beaten or tortured, or being executed.

Now - before I continue and explain the title of this post, allow me to explain the impetus  - a conversation with a friend about tattoos. 

She was excited about getting a new tat and asked me how I felt about them because some people look down on them?

I told her to F what people say, getting a tattoo doesn't mean you're a bad person  - I loved them and would get one, but I've never had the extra money! 😂

In fact, traditional Pacific Islander tattoos are a sort of symbolic "photo album" of their family history and important events, which I think is beautiful.

If I got one, it would be just one, I wouldn't put anyone's name or dates in there because then I'd have to change all my password combinations! 😂

I'd also do something symbolic and in a place less obvious, because I don't want to have to explain to total strangers something so personal - that though something or someone is with me at all times, not everybody has to know about it or what it means, right?

In fact, I know the one I'd get (which I planned on getting for my 40th birthday, years ago, but like I said, never enough extra money!)

However, if you're reading my blog and care enough about what I think and how I feel, then I'll tell you what it means.

So I would have a tattoo artist create their conception of Iron-Jawed Angels, after I either told them the story or they saw the movie.

So for those unaware, the Suffragette Movement - giving women the right to vote - was moving very, very slowly - like 50 years too slow.

That is when little spitfires Alice Paul and Lucy Burns decided to push things along, against the wishes of prominent suffragettes at the time.

They formed the Women's National Party and decided to stand silently in front of the white house holding banners which cleverly contained exact quotes of President Woodrow Wilson's words regarding freedom.

The press coined them as "Iron-Jawed Angels" - little tiny women who stood silent and dignified like statues, their banners asking for the right to have a voice.

It was especially clever to use the President's words about freedom because you can't claim they are  traitors, as many try to do when you protest, if you are essentially throwing the president's own words regarding freedom back at him.

Also, you can, in fact, picket or protest in front of the White House as public grounds without being accused of "trespassing" - though I wouldn't advise it with this current administration!

Because what usually happens is, the powers that be will find some way to flip it back on you and demonize you, having you arrested or worse, even though you are doing nothing criminal and exercising your right to dissent in a peaceful, even silent manner. 

And that's exactly what happened - when Alice Paul began to actually speak in front of the White House, after being ignored for months, though standing silently, rain or shine.

Alice began reading aloud President Wilson's words from paper, then crumpled the paper and threw it into the barrel fire they were using to keep warm - and men AND women standing around began to grab at their banners and then the women themselves, dragging them off.

It was the suffragette women who were arrested, of course, not their attackers - and the charge was "obstructing traffic."

Before I continue, I need to make one thing very clear that I wasn't aware of until later, and that is that though the movie shows women of color standing at the White House - that unfortunately did not happen. 😢

Because Alice Paul asked Ida B. Wells to walk at the back of the Women's March in 1913, not due to her own racism, but due to optics and others' racism and segregation laws in certain parts of the country, she thought it was too much too soon.

Of course, Ida B. Wells refused - calling out Alice's own hypocrisy regarding liberty - and thus has her group stand alongside in the crowd at first, then join the white women in the March alongside them, directly defying Alice Paul's instruction.

(Go Ida B. Wells - LOVE her!)

Once again, American hypocrisy becomes evident in the demands for  equal liberty and justice for all, while still ignoring marginalized and minority groups - "freedom for me, but not for thee."

Regardless, Alice and Lucy's National Women's party and protests continued, and then society does what they do with women who won't be silenced -  threw them all in a mental prison asylum.

At this point, Alice organizes a hunger strike like Gandhi (also in old Irish tradition, which she explains here) and refused to eat - at which point, they strap her down and force feed her.

(No one ever did that to Gandhi, now, did they?)

The psychiatrist assessing her pronounced her sane (based on this interview) - and although he told the government officials, they refused to release her or the other women.

Government officials try to twist the hunger strike into "suicidal," but the psychiatrist reports that he said she was prepared to die to further her cause, and then quotes American patriot hero, Patrick Henry "Give me liberty or give me death."

Someone in the room said "Apples and oranges."

Psychiatrist replies:"In oranges and women, courage is often mistaken for insanity." 

Then one of the other women sneaked a note to her husband about that event, he gave it to the press and their was public outcry - and boom, a few months later, women have the right to vote!

(Then, of course, the other disapproving suffragettes pretended to have supported them the whole time! 😂)

Now, of course, I have never been arrested in my life - but there have been efforts to silence me when speaking truth including the "she's crazy" card - which is almost always the calling card of the guilty, in pre-emptive strike. to discredit anyone from listening to what they have to say  -  now employed by guilty women themselves about other women.. 

Not that there aren't genuinely crazy women in the world, but we're talking about women who attempt to speak truth, particularly when they pull the "she's crazy, don't listen to her" card before the woman ever accuses, in attempt to discredit her in advance.

This is why both sides should always at least be fully heard - always.


And truth be told, by the time you've gone through all of THAT trauma, you might genuinely BE a little crazy for a while, and worse, begin to believe you are crazy and that you deserved it - and you may even self-silence out of fear.

That is, until you heal.😊

You still double-check yourself before you wreck yourself, and you can't get defensive/freak out about it, even though it's a trauma trigger - but you stand firm to your truth regardless of what others think, believe, or say.

But Alice Paul - flawed and blind as she may have been regarding racial freedom - never doubted herself or her own sanity or that what she was doing was necessary for society to stop ignoring and pretending on behalf of a better, healthier, fairer society.

Thus, if/when I get a tattoo, it will be of an artist's vision of a small group of iron-jawed angels - and mine will include depictions of women of ALL races.  😊

If that proves too complex for a local tattoo artist, then they can instead tattoo the statue artwork of Barbara Grygutis called STAND, which stands in downtown Lexington, which instead of depicting any particular women or race, depicts 5 early 20th century suffragettes in metal - with lace floral pattern cutouts, symbolic for the female capacity for possessing both strength and softness. 😊

So .... if someone I know well asks me, I will tell them the more personal aspects - but everyone else will get the standard "suffragettes" or that it's based on the movie, "Iron-Jawed Angels" about Alice Paul and Lucy Burns 😉

American History Liberty Lesson: My Uncle BS Story ...

 

I have told this story many times on here before, but I promised my uncle I'd tell it whenever I thought of it, and while watching the movie "Eleanor the Great," I thought of it.

(BTW, great movie - it's about a woman who had been best friends with a Jewish woman who had survived the holocaust for 70 years, who recently died, who ends up telling her friend's untold story she'd never told anyone as if it happened to her -  which sounds like a horrible thing to do, but if you watch the movie, you understand why.)

So first, I need to explain that Uncle Gene wasn't actually my uncle, he was my grandfather's half 1st cousin - we just called him "Uncle" Gene because he wasn't much younger than my grandfather.

Also, in 2022, after a DNA test, I discovered that I'm actually not genetically related to any of the people I'm about to discuss, but that's another crazy story! 😂

Regardless, I grew up thinking I had no aunts and uncles or first cousins because my parents were only children, so I took all the aunts and uncles I could get! 

Secondly, I need to explain why I call him Uncle BS.

I started calling him that after Southern comedian, Tim Wilson (now deceased), referred to one of his uncles as Uncle BS, and that everyone in the South has one.

So an Uncle BS is your Southern storyteller uncle, who completely makes sh*t up, either to make you laugh or because he's crazy or both. 😂

He would tell me all kind of crazy stories, while growing up, like the reason the Kamikaze pilots crashed into Pearl Harbor was an accident - they crashed because of my Aunt Urpha's pineapple upside-down cake! 😂

He said she sent them her cake as a peace offering and they tried it on the planes and it was so good they forgot what they were doing and crashed into Pearl Harbor! 😂

My grandpa, Pap: "Careful, Mule, you might step in something your Uncle Gene dropped." 😂

("Mule" is my Southern nickname but not for the reason you think, also another story.)

 

Uncle Gene: "May God strike me down if that ain't true, Orville" - with a wink and his fingers crossed behind his back 😂

 

Pap: "Well, I'monna stand over there by that tree, then, it's safer - 'cause ain't nary a word of that is true, Gene,  'cept how good Urpha's cake is." 😂

Now - when I've told that story before, I've used the actual racist language he did exactly, because that's the way he talked and it bothered me to no end, which is exactly why he did it - he was like a little boy, like that, did things for shock value to get a reaction - right up until the story I'm about to tell. 

Unfortunately, that aspect was completely missed on telling this story previously, as was the entire point of the story - I wasn't glorifying his language or giving it a platform, I was illustrating how he did it on purpose to get a rise out of me as a liberal young Social Work student. 

So I won't do that again so there's no misunderstanding  -  but it suffices to say he had a habit of calling different groups by derogatory and even racist names - like Limey for British, Krauts for Germans, Japs for Japanese, Pollocks for Polish, WOPs for Italians, Wetbacks for Mexicans -  and worse -  you get the picture. 

He never used the N word for people of color, but he used another  racial slur nearly as bad.

So he'd use these derogatory terms and I'd scowl at him, even leave the room - then he'd come kiss me on the cheek and say "Just messing with ya, ya Commie Pinko, I love ya."

It was hard to stay mad at him when he did that lol.

The very last time I heard a story by Uncle Gene was in 2007, when my grandmother had terminal lung cancer, and he died not long after - but this one was different.

He joked around for a while, as per his usual, but became uncharacteristically serious, I'd never seen him like that. 

Out of nowhere, he told the following story - which sounds like BS, but I think this one is actually true -  both because I'd never heard this one before and because he cried when he told it, which I'd also never seen - one time only, not long before he died ... 

Uncle Gene: "You know, Mule, I used to call people stuff to get a rise out of you, but I didn't mean it. We was trained to talk like that during the war, so we wouldn't feel bad killing people, I know that. I've always known that. But that ain't how I really feel ..." 

 

"When I was a GI in Poland, I will never forget how them Jewish people were on the day we liberated them from that factory. Chrystal, they was SO happy. You think you know joy, you ain't never seen joy like that, with people freed." 

 

"They couldn't speak English, only Polish, but we understood each other. They was so grateful they got down on their knees and kissed our feet and cried until we told them to stop, we ain't gods, just soldiers trying to do the right thing." 

 

"Then we danced and sang together. They offered to cook for us, but they was rail thin and had no food, they was like the walking dead.  So we shared what little we had with them. You ain't never seen anything like that, just pure joy."

 

"Later, we was trying to eat and drink and be merry and all that bullshit, but it was hard, celebrating, because there was a big stone Nazi swastika bolted over the doorway of the factory, just hanging over us like a dark stormcloud."

 

"So me and 3 of my buddies, we climbed up there and unbolted that nasty thing. We worked on it all night. And you know when we finally got it, right before dawn, that thing crashed down in a million little pieces. A million little pieces, Chrystal."

 

(He teared up at this point.)

"You never saw the like of cheering and dancing and singing and celebrating. A million little pieces."

 

"I don't know why I told you that story, I'm sorry. But this one's actually true lol. You won't find it in any history book, but it is. It took us all night to do it, we had no explosives left." 

"I guess when you near the end, you just want people to know the good you done once, the price of freedom, you want the young people especially to know what we done. What freedom really means. How many had to pay for it with their lives."

 

Me:  " Uncle Gene, you DO have a heart, after all" - 😉 - winking and placing my hand on top of his and giving his hand a playful little shake.

 

Then I stood up and stood behind him sitting, putting my arms around him, and said ...  

"And I believe this one, I've never seen you like this! And I promise you I will tell that story whenever I think of it, okay? Everyone will know. And THANK YOU for what you did for them and for us."

"Hey, not bad for your 'commie pinko' niece, eh? I love ya" - and then I kissed him on the cheek, as he had me, so many times. 😂

He laughed through his tears, and patted my arms around him  - is there any better emotion than laughter through tears? 🥹

Of course, this was back when Republicans and Democrats mostly just teased each other, rather than any politician encouraging others to distrust, fear, and even hate someone because of their political party, using propaganda and false accusations which are believed blindly.

Now - I understand that many old wounds have needed to come to light for a long time, rather than us continuing to pretend, continuing to ignore them, in our society, I do - and that process isn't easy or comfortable, but it is necessary.

But I also miss a time where we just politely disagreed and could do so while still feeling love for each other, rather than utter disgust.

I'm hoping that one day, all lies will be exposed, all truth will be revealed, and that those wounds will finally be addressed and finally healed  - and then perhaps we can return to that someday.

Most importantly, most of us can't remember a time in our lifetime that we've engaged in a a war for honorable reasons - to truly fight for freedom rather than over conquest of land or oil, misguided meddling in other countries' political or religious affairs, or even simply as distraction from our own misdeeds.

We throw around the word "freedom" today selfishly, from an entitled perspective, in terms of our individual rights, having no true idea of what that really means because we have no true frame of reference.

Thus sometimes, I think we need to be reminded of what freedom really means. 

True freedom is NOT the right not to wear a mask or not be vaccinated during a global pandemic.

It is NOT the right to own an assault rifle as a civilian, when a pistol or hunting rifle/shotgun works just as well, if truly intended for self-defense.

It is NOT about the right to not be properly trained or background-checked for crime or mental illness before owning one.

It is NOT about having the right to be a rude, racist, bigoted, false-accusing, lying, propaganda-spreading, intentionally inflammatory A-hole. 

In fact, true freedom isn't about your individual rights at all - it's about equal rights for everyone - which includes the public's right to be protected from you and being the target of your irresponsible, hateful, selfish behavior.

True freedom is about having equal right to speak, vote, be paid for work and even criticize the government or those in power - and in some cases, just exist - despite being different than the majority due to color of skin, religion, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, financial status, or political beliefs - without fear of harassment, imprisonment, forced labor, violence and torture, or death because you disagree or are different than the majority.

Yes, with that comes the fact that you DO have the right to not wear a mask or vaccinate - but the public also has the right to not be exposed to your being especially susceptible to a deadly, highly contagious virus because of your refusal.

Yes, you DO have the right to bear arms to defend yourself - but the public also has the right to be protected from you, especially if you're not trained and haven't proven yourself responsible first. 

Yes, you DO have the right to freedom of speech that doesn't incite violence - but I'm pretty sure our forefathers intended that to mean the right to criticize government leaders and those in power, particularly despotic and tyrannical kings -  NOT the right to be a rude, racist, bigoted, falsely-accusing, propaganda-spreading A-hole.

If you want to abuse the right to freedom of speech to say things you know are hurtful and wrong, feel free - but never forget that you didn't pay for that right, others did, with their lives - and THIS is how you choose to exercise it -  wasting it on sowing seeds of fear and hatred?

So unfortunately, my uncle was right - we've become a nation of spoiled brats who throw around "freedom" having a child's idea of what that really means, throwing tantrums if we don't get exactly what we want, though what we want may not be good for us or anyone around us.

Thus, take this story as intended - reminding you what freedom truly means - and the price our grandfathers, great-grandfathers, uncles and great uncles had to pay for it.

______________________________________________

PS

I just wanted to add the last time I saw Uncle Gene was actually at my grandmother's funeral, right after the interment at the cemetery.

There was a lot of gossip going around, started by my sister - but 5 family members bypassed my older sister completely and made a beeline straight for me - my 2nd stepcousin, Annie, and her son, Corey (whom I used to babysit), my 2nd cousin, Bobby -  and Uncle Gene and Aunt Urpha.

I was floating around in a sort of grief and trauma bubble, but they made it very clear they stood with me, practically circling around me like adult elephants in star formation, protecting their baby! 😂

That is because those people really knew me -  they knew the lies  going around were started by my sister over the will - and they knew that because they visited often and called my grandmother every day - and my sister was nowhere around during until she died.  

So they held onto me in bear hugs and almost didn't let me go - isn't that great of them? 🥹

I could feel the love and defense of me coming off of them, which I never really had in my immediate family - flawed people, maybe - but had hearts of gold, unlike many others in my family. 

Sad, though, because only one of those people is still alive -  Annie's son, Corey - and I understand he's doing very well for himself now, which warms my heart. Sweetest little boy ever, he was 😊

 

PS - Case in point - Ken or Kyle (AKA a Male Karen) ...

 

A few weeks ago, at about 11:00 p.m on a Thursday night, I heard a big ruckus outside and went out on my balcony to see what was going on, because I'm nosy like that, I guess?  😂

So because we have such little parking, our apartment complex has contracted a towing company, supposedly to tow non-resident visitors who park here.

But do they actually come on the weekends and tow people visiting without stickers preventing actual residents from parking?

No, they do not.

Instead, they tow actual residents with residency stickers on their windshield, whom they claim parked "illegally."

Their obvious rationale being, of course, that they know the addresses of the residents and can bill them more easily than random parkers, you see. 😉

We've never been towed, thank goodness - but it is usually residents towed. 

Below is an example of the "illegal" parking according to the tow company.

No, it's not the Chevy Charger parked on the white parking line (although if the tow company came by, he'd get towed for that, too).

It's the unmarked area circled in red.

As you can see, there's plenty of space for a car between that last  white parking line and the "maintenance parking only" sign a few yards away. 

You can also clearly see that there is no handicapped parking spot in front of that building, but there is one in front of our building. 

Thus, there is an older couple who lives in that building and parks there, his wife being handicapped and having all of the appropriate stickers and tags - and no one cares that they do. It's well known to just be "their spot" and none of us park there because of it.

Also, it's the only free spot for people moving in with moving trucks - and just 2 days after this event, the same towing guy came back during the day and started to tow a Ryder moving truck with its hazard lights on, until the father of the college student moving in came out and started yelling that he had office permission  to park there, to call them and check.

That time, the office was open, so they told towing guy to stop.  

(Mind you, literally 2 spaces down from this spot was an old Toyota Camry that belongs to no one here, with no sticker, parked there for 2 days that he ignored.)

In other words, Towing Guy is an A-hole. 

So he starts to tow the car of the older couple whose wife is handicapped for being in that "unmarked spot" at close to midnight on a Thursday.

Everyone in that building - and I do mean everyone - came out to yell at the guy to stop, she's handicapped and has nowhere to park. 

The guy whose wife is disabled got really mad and said "Dude, I'm gonna sue you, if you do take it, plus you raked the front of it across the ground when you put it on the truck, to the point we saw sparks. If there's damage to my car, you're in  double trouble."

The problem was - tow truck driver thought he said "SHOOT you."

(To be honest, I wasn't sure myself at first, from up on the balcony, until he said it again, several more times, and it was definitely "SUE you")

So I'm just standing on the balcony observing, and I notice the tow truck guy is just sitting there in his truck with the windows rolled up scrolling on his phone, with my neighbor's car on the back of his truck, but doesn't leave -  which is only escalating things.

So I'm thinking to myself "Just take it and go, then, why you just sitting there still, letting it escalate?"

At this point, my spidey senses started tingling that there was something racial about this that I couldn't quite put my finger on, other than this truck driver was a white redneck with a Trump sticker and almost all the residents of that building are black. 

So then I proved it was racially motivated.

How?

I tested it.

I went down there to my neighbors and asked them to let me just try to talk to the driver for a second to de-escalate it.

When I tapped on the window, he smiled and rolled it down for me, right away!  😂

Three guesses as to why white redneck tow truck driver with a Trump sticker opened the window to talk to me VS. the rest of my neighbors in that building, who are almost all black  😂

So I asked his side of things. 

He said he called the police on them because they threatened to shoot him.

I told him I thought he said that at first, too, but when he said it 3 more times, it was clear he said "sue." 

I then said I didn't know if calling the police was necessary because I think he may have misheard him PLUS it was clear he had no gun anyway, he was wearing nothing but boxer shorts because he'd been in bed lol.

I said to maybe just take the car and go, rather than call the police over threats he can't prove and may have misheard -  because all that's being accomplished by sitting here in his tow truck, with their car on his truck, is escalating it.

Also, I was thinking "If you truly felt threatened that someone was going to shoot you, why would you just sit in your car and scroll on your phone until the police arrived instead of just leaving and then calling the police?" - but I didn't say that lol. 

Regardless, this conversation did indeed result in a brief reprieve of my neighbors yelling at him, and then sure enough, the police that the tow truck driver had called arrived - 2 white cops, male and female.

 I turned around then and said to my neighbors "Heads up, y'all, he called the cops, - that's why he's still here."

However, I was pleasantly surprised - I stepped back and let my neighbors talk to the cops who DID listen to them about what had gone on and they were honest and admitted to threatening to sue him.

The cops then walked over to verify the spot wasn't clearly marked, that his wife was handicapped and did have the appropriate stickers on their car,  and that there was no handicapped spot for that building for them.

So then cops said "Yeah, these guys are predatory, They don't care what the rules are, they just want their money and will tow you if you so much as park too far over on a line. It's really a civil issue, I'm not sure why he called us or why he's still sitting here."

Then the female cop knocked on his window -  with the driver still in it, still claiming he felt unsafe - so he rolled his window down and started to go into how all "those people" were "threatening to shoot him." 😂

Lady cop just held up her hand and said "Sir? Enough. I don't know who said what, I wasn't here, but no one has a gun.  This is a civil matter. You can go. Take the car and go, then, there's no reason for you to be sitting here escalating it.."

THEN I chimed in and said "I think this was all just a big misunderstanding. As you can see, this spot isn't clearly marked. I also think the threat to sue was misheard as shoot, another misunderstanding. I think it just freaked him out."

Big bad redneck tow truck driver said "I'm NOT scared!!! I was unsafe! I have to deal with this all the time, I call the cops all the time!"

Lady Cop just says "Yeah, we know. You can go."

Hehehe - and Amen! 😂😂😂

Then one of my neighbors in that building yelled down from her balcony "Yeah, Bye! Don't come back until you do your job right, on a Saturday night, towing people who don't even live here, instead of picking on poor old handicapped people who do!"

😂😂😂

Love her, she's hilarious!

The cops even stifled a laugh with that, because it's true.

My neighbors notified the apartment manager the next day, whose hands were tied from helping them get their car out of impound because the spot really isn't clearly marked and thus had no basis for argument - but you can bet it's on her work calendar to mark now!

(I also think she should start keeping track of how many residents are towed versus others and tell them she is, and if there are too many residents, she's switching companies, but that's just my opinion and no one asked lol.)

The maintenance guy was actually mad this happened to them, that old "maintenance" sign is left over from old management,  they didn't park there anyway, they parked in between -  and he's not there at midnight on a Thursday night fixing stuff anyway and doesn't care if anyone did park exactly in that spot.😂

Because these are really nice people, very kind, no trouble at all, very quiet, mostly older people. They were just mad he was picking on this old couple, who have both the required proof-of-residency and handicapped stickers/tags. 

Now - the situation in the below post was NOT racial, but it does show you how men can be just as Karenish as women, if not worse to call the police over nonsense.

And the guy from that post's entire point was she should be calling the police instead of asking who to call about her situation on Reddit as the "rational" thing to do.

Um - not always. And the moment she did that, she'd be labeled a Karen, guaranteed.

What Would YOU Do?

 

So I rarely comment anywhere anymore, unless it's to leave a positive review. 

I do have a Reddit account, but I mostly just read about local things going on, when they come to my email.

However, today, a lady in my area said she witnessed a guy slap the crap out of his dog, while walking her dog.

She reflexively said "Please don't hit your dog."

The white guy in his 50s, wearing a blue SEC ball cap, then went off on her, name-calling, etc.

She just walked away. 

Then he came up behind her again, starting it up again, threatening her.

She just took a picture ... then ran away.

She was asking Reddit which agency to call on the dog's behalf for sure, wondering if the police was also appropriate for her as well. 

Honestly, other large cities have the ASPCA and actual officers, but we have only the Humane Society and I'm not sure what they do.

If I witnessed that, I would likely call my vet and ask, which is what I recommended.

I also might consider calling the non-emergency line of the police if he was truly threatening towards me, but likely not (as long as he didn't actually follow me home).

I started reading through the comments for other suggestions, not knowing for sure myself.

Of course, some misogynistic A-hole had to start trouble and tell her the "rational" thing to do would be to call the police rather than ask a bunch of strangers on the internet, and spent several paragraphs mansplaining that in snark.

Then of course a couple of other dudes piled on, talking about how stupid she was to say anything - both to the dog-slapper and on Reddit - you know, the usual misogynistic shit.

So I'm thinking to myself ...

Nice. 

You know what? You don't know how long she's lived here or how many people she knows here in town yet, what a welcome, "Southern Gentlemen?"

(More proof that "Southern charm" is an illusion myth.)

The truth is, I've lived here for years and even I don't know which agency to call.

And yes - though they're right that saying anything to him at all to a guy like that was NOT wise - when something like that happens right in front of you, harming a smaller innocent - it's just a reflex, especially as women, to say "Please don't" - and sometimes it's putting yourself in harm's way to save them!

Thus, not being in the best mood due to a couple of things - not school or work, somebody frustrating from the past - I decided to do something unwise myself - almost as unwise as the OP telling the guy not to hit his dog, I admit.

Not because they have any idea who I am or would come after me in real life -  but because I should have learned, by now, that standing up for other people being piled on or bullied (online OR real life) only makes YOU their new target - best to approach the victim instead (which I did).

And twice, decades ago, I've actually seen the initial pile-on/cyberbullying victim hop on later against YOU after you became the new target for standing up for them -  so happy the heat's off them now, and that they now fit in with a bunch misogynistic bully losers and their immature, enabling cackling hens.

Congratulations! What a prize!😂

At that point, you're thinking "Why the hell did I waste my time and stand up for you, then, when you're clearly just as character-deficient and completely lacking in any discernable integrity as they are?" 😂

So you just never know who you're defending anyway, unless you know them in real life.

However, this situation was pretty clear - and what is also true is that back in the day, I sometimes had the ability to legitimately put a stop to trolls attacking/piling on people, by just making them look incredibly stupid, because they're usually not very bright. 😂

I stopped doing that many years ago,  because ... it's the internet, and that's what people do on the internet. 

It's apparently how people prefer to behave on the internet when they're anonymous, act like a bunch of unevolved chimps, rather than exhibit basic human decency.

It has truly become the bathroom stall wall of the world 😂

I really can't stand pile-ups on people, or people just attacking someone who simply asked a question. I admit, it's a flaw of mine  - it's hard for me to walk away, but I have learned to. My mom said I've been like that since I was a child, stand up for the underdog (but when it's happening to ME, I never know when or how to lol).

But like I said, I was in no mood for it today - so I pulled out and dusted off the old fighter-for-the-underdog within me and wrote this ... 

Dude - are you the guy? lol

I think you missed the part where she didn't know the correct agency/agencies to call in Lexington in this case - which in this case, I don't know either (I'm sorry, OP).

In other larger cities, the ASPCA has actual animal officers that check on the welfare of pets, but I'm not sure the Lexington Humane Society has that?

You also forgot the part where she sounds like a woman.

Not only do we often doubt ourselves when we witness or experience something genuinely disturbing and don't report it because of people immediately calling us "irrational," such as you did, when we report anything, anywhere - but also because we don't want to overreact and be a Karen.

Because contrary to popular belief, not all women are Karens who call the police immediately - we ask the appropriate route first. In other words, we check ourselves before we wreck ourselves (you should try it).

And lastly ... so you took the time to answer someone asking asking a question on the internet with several paragraphs of snark about people who ask questions on the internet.

Which of your presented categories of wrongful, inappropriate internet usage does THAT fall in?

Gee, it's a mystery why truly non-Karenish women who see or experience something genuinely disturbing and/or illegal don't automatically call the police and ask others what the best route is first, , isn't it? 

Certainly NOT because they know they'd be told told they're "irrational" or dismissed as a Karen or anything! 😂

Not going back, I said my piece and that's it.

I know, stupid idea - but I felt better?  😂

Seconding An Open Letter by a Former Medical Transcriptionist

 

I came across this open letter today to a Health Information Management publication called "For The Record" written by an older MT, lamenting the transition and eventual loss of the medical transcriptionist jobs. 

I could've written this letter myself, it's so accurate - and very difficult to explain to prospective employers and must sound hard to believe, but it's all true. And try explaining it and still sounding positive lol. 

She's also lamenting the lack of contractor-protection legislation or unionization and lack of pushback from the only official transcription association that exists, the AAMT association (who did nothing for MTs anyway, but give guidelines.)

I had to screenshot piecemeal style due to its length ...

She covers the loss of benefits and pay cuts (to pay-by-line typed) starting with offshore outsourcing in 2006, the transition to voice recognition in 2007 turning us into editors at half the pay, the feast-or-famine workload - and even since this article was written in 2016, you're now lucky if you make even $15K per year, such that you have to piece 2 or 3 contracts together (or do temp jobs and/or wait tables as second and third jobs, which at most, you'll make 30K).

The only things she didn't mention are the advent of AI making us almost obsolete without even editing (despite the fact that it is not ready), the predatory/scam nature of some companies and fake job ads, knowing some are desperate.

And though most reputable schools stopped teaching medical transcription, there are still some unethical ones taking people's money knowing full well there are no jobs!

One of the biggest challenges I personally have faced in the last 5 years was the difficulty in obtaining prior references prior to my current job for the last 6 years, despite leaving on good terms and being a top producer/quality.

Many companies have gone under or have transitioned to other business interests (like legal-only transcription with prior experience) and have all new staff.

And as far as coworkers, we were subcontractors - so we were lucky if we even knew who are coworkers were - we usually just QA, trainers, and management! 

And sometimes, with those who became sweatshops, they don't care enough to respond to reference requests, even from official written requests from prospective employers, despite you  being a top producer and top quality!

This ends up looking shady on you, and you can't prove you were, because they won't even respond because they do not give a shit.

Also not mentioned are the unprofessional emails in all caps that began to appear around 2009, demanding us to hop on outside our shifts and do mandatory OT, though you don't get paid extra for OT as contractors.

I always did this, btw, but after all the pay cuts, you'd still only make a whopping total of about $350 a week maximum even with OT, at such low pay.

But my favorite were the constant broadcast email threats, also in all-caps and exclamation points, that the account could be lost for errors. They never seemed to get it that we don't need our job threatened to take them seriously, nor that this idle threat only works for so long, not to mention that level of perfection for pennies is  just absurd.

As Theresa mentions, only about 25% of doctors even read their own reports back (good luck with that with AI, docs), so if they actually them and complain, I can assure you, it's never because you put an extra period at the end of a sentence!

But the absolute worst was when a few of the companies began policies of actually docking your pay for even minor errors, so that they MADE money off of you!

Lastly, likely not mentioned because this letter was written in 2016 - any jobs left in the last 10 years became so scarce that people became so cutthroat and bullying, even willing to sabotage others' work -  particularly new people, especially if they were good. 

Even with the few hospital jobs left that paid hourly, people had become so accustomed to this overly competitive behavior that they can't stop behaving like that, even when it's completely unnecessary!

It wasn't like that for my first 10 years in this field - it became that way as jobs and work grew scarce. 

In other words, most of the jobs left - BUT NOT ALL - have people who lack any discernible integrity or maturity whatsoever.

Good people - meaning not just productivity and quality wise,  but maturity and integrity wise as well - are usually bullied out or never make it into QA or the "Clique of Mean Girl Management" - and don't want to.

(Again - NOT ALL - I love my boss for the last 6 years, but we were finally replaced completely by AI  last fall. They'd apparently been testing it for a year or so, then took over. Every few months we'll get spillover, but that's just one or two jobs)

Aside: For the record, when I did make it into QA, I saw/heard my fellow QA people admittedly bullying newbies for even asking a question, especially if they questioned a score (though they were often correct).  They would expressly call them "stupid new people."

One of those times, it was racially motivated.

This, of course, turned my stomach and I didn't participate - and 2 times, I actually stood up for those people whom they bullied on the company forum. 

You can imagine what happened -  I found myself their new target, so lesson learned (finally) - approach the victim, don't take on the bullies!

A couple of times, I was directly bullied myself - not because I stood up for new people or those of a different race, but just because they didn't like me or my politics (which I never spoke about it at work, only written here) - OR - because I was actually good at my job and well-liked, and they were overly competitive. 

BTW, if the aforementioned is still reading here, as I know you did at one time - I was never, ever "trying to make you look bad" or after your job NOR was I trying to get in management - I felt lucky to still have a job in this field and was just trying to do my best to show gratitude. 

Also, my budding friendship with our manager was genuine, not a ploy - THAT bothered you more than how well I was doing, didn't it?

For the record, I never told her OR said a bad word about you to her until the day I left. (YOU, on the other hand ran your mouth the entire time - dishonestly.) 

Because I learned in my 20s that you can't control what people believe and it's selfish to try and put people in the middle. (And usually, the one loudest mouth/with the most power/been there longer wins despite truth anyway.)  

But believe it or not, even though you literally scared the shit out of me that day, I actually really liked you up until that point!

But let me also say this - even though you weren't honest?

As long as you never did it again to anybody else as a result my leaving, then I'm happy 😂.

Back to the letter, I am hoping the person who wrote this letter - and the hundreds of others in this situation - was able to transition to something else, despite her age, particularly since she had an associate HIM degree.

I have transitioned to become a cancer registrar, currently in school at UC and have a 4.0 GPA!

In 6 months, I have not seen or heard even a single rude, overly competitive, or bullying word from anyone towards anyone else, online or otherwise - everyone is genuinely encouraging and supportive of one another. 

And I just recently connected with our official state cancer registry, the Kentucky Cancer Registry, about membership and job outlook - and even though I discovered there's no state membership association, they were kind enough to meet with me on Teams about career goals and how they could help!

I almost fell out of my chair, their eagerness to support my new entry into the field, it's been so long  - so long that I had begun to think I must deserve being treated like I was in transcription, in the end.

I'm sure not everyone in this field is this kind, but most of them really are - they're a team, not sitting in silos trying to pull others down to lift themselves up, like crabs in a bucket.

I wish I had done this years ago!

Also, there are associations both regionally and nationally, as well as national funding sources for the cancer registries themselves, covered by both by federal and state cancer law.

They advocate for us and have even done studies about the work done and staffing needs - and they will push back if anyone tries to implement to a total AI takeover, because though AI can honestly be a great tool, it should never replace human review (at least not yet, it's not near ready).

The only catch is - I will be 59 when I graduate. 

I have already had THIS said to me 2 times on prior interviews for other jobs:  "You don't fit the culture."

Since I openly embrace diversity and inclusion, I finally figured out what this means - it's the new codespeak for 'you're older than everybody else."

Maybe -  but I get along with the younger students very well, considering my sense of humor, plus keeping up with pop culture. 

I still have a very sharp, fast mind, evident by my 4.0 GPA, being Dean's List and in Phi Theta Kappa Honor Society, and I am at the top of my class compared to many of those younger students.

And I'm thin and healthy - though you can clearly tell I'm in my 50s, I don't look 57.

And I don't go out as much or party, so no missed work due to hangovers etc. - in fact, no missed work at all.

And I figure because there is a shortage of Cancer Registrars currently, particularly certified ones, certifications make that age discrimination argument a little bit harder for prospective employers, right?

I wish Theresa and the others well - and cross your fingers for me! 😃

Stay positive, stay sharp, and never lose hope at whatever age, right?

(Feel free to remind me, on days like today when I forget lol).