Family Member With Both COVID and Pneumonia

I had a prior post on this subject, but parked it in draft, because we were asked to hold mentioning who it is, on social media, until all family members are told privately, and not all have been reached yet.

Prayers up, please?  

UPDATE:   The family member is not on oxygen or a respirator yet and not in ICU.  The pneumonia is a secondary bacterial infection to COVIDA, not part of COVID. 

As for treatment, a few things have already been tried, but there has been no improvement, but the good news is, there also has been no progression of the disesase.

The regimen was changed again (as I've mentioned previously as a medical transcriptionist, doctors don't care about what politicians or hedge-fund shareholders say, they will try anything for their patients for what works.

At present, they are on a new antibiotic for the pneumonia, sinus medication, and pain medication.  

The person was an avid daily runner before being infected, so this is likely the reason they are  not on a respirator or oxygen, as of yet rather than any regimen, very good physical condition and health before this, and yet the secondary bacterial pneumonia infection isn't clearing.

It is likely that the viral infection and the bacterial infection are  complicating the treatment of each other; thus, treating and clearing the bacterial infection with an antibiotic will help the body to only have to then fight COVID, but it's a matter of finding which antibiotic the bacterial pneumonia is sensitive to.

They are fighting it, very strong person - keep the prayers coming, though. 

Update:  9/22/2020

Now that all family has been contacted, we can reveal that it is Mark's stepdad. 

We spoke to him tonight, he sounds much stronger :)  

The other day, he could only give one or two words, struggling to breathe.

Unfortunately, they were certain that COVID had now entered his lungs.  He is still not on oxygen or a respirator, though, likely attributed to the fact that he was an avid daily runner, mountain climber, and tennis player - but it's watch and wait. 

As for symptoms, he said he first lost his smell and taste completely, then he he had the worst sinus blockage of his life, then the fever, then struggled to breathe, then came to the ER.

He was very careful, wore a mask everywhere, very clean, so right now, it's track and trace.

However, there is still so much we don't know about this virus, and we know that surgical masks sometimes gap or don't fit properly.

Also, IMO,  people have become so focused on masks that wearing gloves has all but been forgotten, forgetting this thing is also is also droplet-borne, right?

I still wear gloves, too, when I go out - not that even that will necessarily protect me, but it helps.

Regardless, keep those prayers coming, please?

________________________

Update:  9/23/2020

He was even stronger last night :) The pneumonia aspect is improving and his fever is down to 100.  They talked about sending him home within the next couple of days, but will see how it goes today - he's still pretty weak, his joints still hurt, and so do his lungs, though they're better.  They'd like to get his temp down to under 100. They also mentioned that they have a service that comes out in hazmat suits and fumigates your home before your return - no joke!

He's on the COVID ward and says he feels fortunate - he's encouraged to walk around because of the pneumonia, and he can see other people in rooms, and they are all on respirators and oxygen - scary stuff.   

Also, people are bugging him to death about signing new DNRs/living wills in case he takes a turn, which he already signed when he entered, plus asking him every five minutes where he's been 5,000 times, trying to figure out where he contracted it, but he hasn't been anywhere but the grocery, running in his neighborhood, and playing tennis, which he's already told them 5,000 times.

Fingers crossed ...

Update:  09/24/2020

He was feeling much better, but today, he developed kidney pain.

He has had no history of kidney problems, not even stones  - and a little known fact about COVID is that sometimes, COVID attacks the kidneys as well. 

  

RIP, RBG

 Heartbroken, one of my heroes (heroines) :(

What a little stick of dynamite, she was :)

Amazingly, the tiny little woman was scared of nothing - because she knew she was usually the smartest person in the room lol. 

Not sure what we'll do without her on the Supreme Court - she will be missed :(

Clearing Up the Wayfair Credit Card Bank Changeover Confusion - I Think? :)

Update:  Please see the important P.S. at the end.  It appears Lisa wasn't entirely correct, either :(

____________________________________________

While writing this post,  I spoke to someone who finally explained it to me in a way that made sense, and now I get it.

Thank you, Lisa! :)

Because though some Wayfair CSRs are saying otherwise, according to the last CSR I spoke with Lisa, a supervisor - who just happened to answer the phone due to heavy call volume - Wayfair apparently did NOT end their contract with the bank abruptly and not tell their customers - they claim it was Comenity Bank, the issuer of the Wayfair credit card, that abruptly ended their contract with Wayfair early, on September 11th, and failed to inform their cardholders.

According to Lisa, Comenity Bank didn't inform Wayfair itself until September 11th - and the action was taken against Wayfair's wishes.

As for me, I only have one other credit card, a basic all-purpose credit card, and I don't get department store cards because of the higher interest rates.

However, because of the special perks and sales with Wayfair if you have their card, I applied for a Wayfair credit card on August 3rd, directly from Wayfair's website, and received it.

I made a few purchases, great quality, arrived often very early, I was very happy.  I made my first payment, well over the minimum amount, as I always do, with plenty of credit left on the card.

However, when I tried to purchase a throw blanket for the sofa today, the card wasn't an option in the payment field, despite there being plenty of room on the card, and making my first payment ahead of schedule and over the minimum.

So I called customer service/tech support because I thought there was either a glitch or perhaps something else was needed on my end, since there was plenty of room on my card for purchases.

Instead, I was told that Wayfair abruptly ended their contract early with Comenity Bank - the bank that provided the Wayfair credit cards -  on September 11th, and were now going to use Citibank as their Wayfair credit card.

Regardless of who is to blame, the end result is the old Wayfair credit card with Comenity Bank I'd just applied for and received on August 3rd, which still has plenty of credit on it - which could only be used at Wayfair  - is now useless - because Wayfair is no longer using Comenity Bank as their credit card carrier.

The only option now is to apply for their new Wayfair card with Citibank, their new bank, because the old balance on the old Wayfair card cannot be transferred to the new Citibank Wayfair card.

This, would mean I apply twice for credit with Wayfair within 60 days, receive 2 hits to my credit score, have 2 payments for 2 different cards for the same store, and 2 interest rates.

Of course I'm not going to do that.  Who would? 

The first CSR I spoke with at Wayfair had nothing to offer for the trouble, and in fact, seemed to totally lack in empathy or patience for helping clear my confusion about what just happened.

In fact, the conversation with the first CSR, went like this ...

Melissa/CSR 1:  "We're not responsible, your credit card contract is with a third-party bank, so it's their job to let you know we ended our contract with them, not ours. And you have the option to apply for our new card, with our new bank."

 

Me:  "Okay, but I applied for the card from your site, the card has your name on it - in fact, it says "Wayfair Credit Card," not the "Comenity Bank Card," and it was your decision to end the contract with that bank early, not the bank's, right? But you carry no responsibility for this?"

 

Melissa/CSR 1:  "Well, we have the right to switch banks whenever we want. You have a choice to pay with a debit card directly from your bank account, nobody's forcing you to apply for our Wayfair cards."

 

Me:  "Oh, so it IS  Wayfair's card and your responsibility, then? Because you just used the word "our cards. :)"   

"And did you seriously just try to blame me for this, saying it's my choice to get into this mess, when there's no way I could've known this was going to happen, when even you admitted Wayfair customer service didn't even know until September 11th, and Wayfair left it to the bank to tell the customers - but didn't? "


"Nice try, but we are NOT going to blame me, the customer, for the crappy, sudden decision made to end contracts between your company and the bank - NONE of this is MY fault - the fault lies somewhere between your company and the bank, and I'm definitely not holding this bag of crap for either of you, sorry, that's a manipulation fail - so try again lol."

"And are you trying to sell me a new card or not? Because I can't tell - one minute you're saying no one forced me to get your card, like I shouldn't have applied for it in the first place, but the next you're asking me to apply for your new card as my only option, so now I'm more confused than ever :)"

 

Melissa/CSR 1:  "No, your contract is with the third-party bank, not with us, with Wayfair-"

 

Me:  "With your company's name on card, Melissa, which I applied for directly through your website.  And again, it isn't called the Comenity Bank card, it's called the Wayfair Credit Card.  I'm not going to get legal, but I doubt if someone did sue you, including the bank you just ended your contract early with, the "it's not our responsibility" excuse would fly.  :) 

 

"Now, I'm not blaming you, you're not an executive making these decisions, and I realize there's nothing you can do or offer, your hands are tied from a CSR perspective - I'm just asking if you can even understand my frustration? Because your attitude doesn't sound like you do in the least."

 

"So let's just talk human to human, Melissa. If this happened to you, what would you do?"


"Would YOU want to apply for another credit for Wayfair, less than 60 days after applying for/being approved for the first one - causing a double hit to your credit score, making now two payments - one for a card you can't even use - and paying double interest, just because the store up and decided they wanted a different bank?"

 

 

Melissa/CSR 1:  "I don't know anything about that because I don't have any credit cards. Well, not in my name, my husband does.  No, you can't use the card you just were granted because we ended our contract with that bank.  However, you have the option to apply for the new Wayfair card.  The bank that holds your card should've told you that. "

 

Me:  "Wowwww, okay.  So ... though you have no personal experience with credit yourself,  you don't even pay the bills, your husband does - you somehow obtained a job with Wayfair as a credit CSR, imagining you're qualified to instruct anyone at all on applying for even one credit card, let alone multiple credit cards, with your company?" 

 

"Oh, I don't think so. Wow, Wayfair's making good business decisions for their customer's all the way around, then, aren't they? LOL " 

 

"Okay, wait, that was out of line.  Look ... I'm sorry.  I'm sorry for the sarcasm, that wasn't necessary.  This really isn't your fault OR my fault, but despite having no personal experience with credit yourself, don't you think you could have the tiniest bit of empathy and understanding for the frustration this caused those of us who are cardholders in good standing, who weren't even informed?" 

 

"I mean, I've been through all my emails, my spam, my regular mail - there's nothing from anyone, Wayfair OR Comenity bank, about this taking place." 

 

"But okay, I get it, there's nothing you can do, I'm screwed. Thank you for your time. I'm sorry, but no - I won't be applying for that new card with Wayfair now with Citibank, because I can't financially, and I shouldn't have to, after I just did on August 3rd, I qualified already and I still have hundreds of dollars left on the to make purchases, but it's now useless to be used at Wayfair or anywhere."

As I said, I don't hold any department store cards - in fact I only have one other credit card, a basic all-purpose card - and I opened this card because of special discounts and to expand my credit score.

However, I can't imagine if let's say Macy's suddenly changed their credit-card issuing bank and stuck you with a useless previous card and asked you to apply for a new one - who has ever heard of a reputable department store ever doing that?

So I figured something wasn't right, here, Wayfair isn't a shady business, their reputation, at least up until now, is every bit as good as Macy's.

In fact, with the CSR on speaker, my husband, Mark, was yelling, "That's a shady Trumper business scam move.  See, this is the result of Trump and GOP senate rolling back Obama's consumer protection laws. Hang up on the fucking Trumpers! You're better than I would be, I would've said "Fuck you" already and hung up.  Why do you keep trying to understand these people? LOL" in the background.

In fact, I had to shush him to hear LOL.

But after I thanked her and hung up, I called back, figuring something wasn't right - and spoke with Lisa - who was AWESOME!

Lisa/CSR 2:  "No, no - I think there are some confused CSRs.  But please understand, we weren't informed of this ourselves until 6 days ago, so many are speaking without knowing the facts.  Which as I understand it, we, at Wayfair did NOT end the contract with the bank, they ended the contract early with us, and without warning."

 

"And though it's true that we do have the right to change banks, we didn't - and even if we did, we would find a less crappy manner,  far in advance, which Comenity didn't do at all, for at least half of their customers."  

"And if it was our decision, we would offer you some compensation for the trouble because then it would be our responsibility - but because it was the bank's decision and not ours, it isn't - they screwed us too, basically LOL" 

"Did someone at Wayfair tell you it was Wayfair's decision?"

Me:    "Yep, actually two people - the first person said she didn't understand the details, but she believed Wayfair made the decision. The second one was as I told you, she really had no game at all lol."

"Thank God, I called back, thank you!  I knew something wasn't right, this didn't make sense - and the scary thing is that those two CSRs DO think Wayfair made the decision and tried to make me feel bad for ever applying in the first place, as if it was MY fault lol." 

"Wayfair is a reputable company and they're great with communication, I knew something was off - now it makes sense!"

"Oh thank God, if I hadn't spoken to you, and you hadn't explained what really happened, I never would've used Wayfair again, but I will." 

 

"However, courtesy of Comenity bank, since the Wayfair credit card I just received a month ago is now useless, I guess I'll just be cutting it up and making lovely home decor out of THAT, instead of buying more home decor at Wayfair, because I won't be applying for the New Citibank card for a couple of months - you know, for when my points go back up from the last credit pull for applying for the original Comenity Wayfair card lol"

 

 

Lisa/CSR 2:   "LOL! Hilarious! Right? Aw, I'm not laughing at you, though, I get it - but just remember, they screwed us too - and not helping is some CSRs actually believe WE did this and think it's reasonable to not even offer understanding or empathy for customers. That just blows my mind, that they'd even think we'd ever do that, and that's okay!"

"Just know, you're not alone. We're getting hundreds of calls, Comenity didn't tell many. That's why even though I'm a supervisor, I'm actually helping answer phones directly today. Actually, of the ones Comenity bank did inform, that's the way we CSRs found out - we knew before the company knew, because some customers called in about the Comenity letter, completely confused. We had no idea how to respond, because Comenity didn't even bother to tell Wayfair yet lol. Our customers were like "surprise!" We had no idea what to say because we didn't even know lol."

Me:    "Well, it sounds like you're better off without that bank, with the way they do business. Citibank's fairly reputable. Somewhat, anyway, comparatively.  You know how all corporate banks can be, these days.  That's why I use a small local bank." 

"I just wish we all had a better heads up, but it is what it is, I guess. Thanks again for your time and explanation, I'll be back.   Well, in a few months, when my credit score points go back up, then I'll apply for the new Wayfair card lol. "

 

Lisa/CSR 2:     "Seriously, right? LOL You're very welcome, and I'm SO sorry the priors steered you wrong and that this happened, but yes, it screwed us too, and it's actually pretty embarrassing for us, we had no control and we all got burned from it.  I'm a supervisor, you just happened to catch me, and my name's Lisa, you can be assured this is the correct info. Have a great rest of your day."

Okay, Lisa was awesome - and I'm really not trying to be a Karen - but what are we supposed to say or do? 

I mean, we can all see that people are shittier than ever, in general, right now - and as kind and fair as you try to be, many people are being especially unreasonable, right now, saying and doing crazy shit.

And when they are, and when stuff like this happens that affects you, your credit scores, or in some cases, even your can affect health and safety - we're supposed to what, lie down and take it, for fear of being called "a Karen" if we don't? 

(Mind you, note that the same men calling any woman who even politely voices a concern about anything a "Karen" are always themselves the biggest petty, whiny, bitches themselves,  on a daily basis, that I've ever seen in my life - the type to throw a tantrum if McDonald's so much as puts ketchup on their burger when they didn't want it lol.  However, God knows that when a man calls a woman Karen, it IS, irrationally, a very effective deflection tool off their own daily tantrums/bitchedness ;)

Regardless, sometimes you have to speak up, if for nothing else, just to help you understand what happened and the policies better? :)

_______________________

PS - After I wrote the above, I called Comenity Bank, because Wayfair suggested it, to see if they had anything to offer, since it was their choice and their responsibility.

Comenity told me that's not true - these things actually happen frequently, and they are almost always a a mutual decision, so it would surprise him if it was just his bank's decision and not a mutual one between Comenity and Wayfair - especially considering this is the second time Wayfair has used their bank for their credit cards, and Wayfair only returned just a just a few months ago - so it would surprise him if his bank just cut them loose after allowing them to return just a couple of months ago.

So that was useful information - and I believe him.

And the truth is, I don't think anyone's lying on either Wayfair's side or the bank's side - I think just being CSRs, they don't know what really happened. 

I asked him, isn't there any legal protection or credit protection from companies and banks doing this sort of thing?



The CSR said ... "Not anymore."

Which of course makes Mark right - this IS the result of Trump and Congressional rollbacks of consumer-protection laws with corporate companies and banks, which set in place by Obama and the congress of 2009 :(

In fact, I remember when Obama set forth the consumer protection laws, and Congress approved them, to stop the bleeding.

Because the transcription company I was working for went bankrupt and I never got my last paycheck - and my credit card company charged late fees 4 times in one month - and I wasn't alone, it happened to many people during the recession.

Thus, Obama specifically announced his plan to stop this, as well as other consumer-protection laws and Wall Street (Frank-Todd) law.
Congress passed it, and it all stopped - immediately.

However, all of those consumer-protection laws are now gone - courtesy of Trump and a Republican Senate - and corporations get record-high tax shelters in addition to shady business practices like this.

In my opinion, if we are headed towards another recession, it won't be because of just COVID - it will be because of the return of same shady corporate business practices and tax shelters that were in place that led to the fall of the economy and stock market in October of 2008, - which people forget was one month before Obama was even elected.

Actually worse - because these same corporate protections are in place more than ever :(

He also said that I mentioned Macy's as an example, and in recent years, this has, and will continue to happen, with Macy's as well.  It happened with Amazon yet, but it will.  It screws their own customer's credit, but they do, and they don't care.

Comenity Bank CSR:   "I feel bad for you guys, because you apply having no idea this is going to happen and get stuck with a card you can't use and a hit to your credit, but it happens all the time."

Me:   "Why did they even continue to accept applications, knowing they were going to do this?"

Comenity Bank CSR:  "That, I can't say, that's above my pay grade, but I think we both know they're all happy to take your money and don't care you can't use it anymore or what happens to your credit score. All I can tell you is we continued to take applications for a credit card right until August 24th, anyway. And that I, personaly, feel bad for your guys. And I wish there was something I could do, but I can't. I'm sorry this happened, but ... lesson learned about store credit cards in 2020?"

Affirmative :(

So in the end, all I've learned is that in a way, it is my fault, considering I've never had an online store credit card like this before and had no idea this could happen.  

Sometimes  you're the statue, sometimes you're the pigeon lol - and there's nothing you can do but take it.  

I guess it's just I've had more than my share of this kind of crap.

Never again, though - I'll pay this off and stick with just my other all-purpose card - regardless of what better deals are offered if you have get the store credit cards - because you can't even use the card if the store changes banks :(

Ya know, I didn't expect it to turn out this way - when I initially wrote this post.  In fact, I was trying to be positive about someone handling a situation well (Lisa), and the Comenity Bank CSR was very good, too - it's just I can't get the real story from either, because they didn't tell their CSR's enough info, nor the correct info, and they keep blaming each other - and there's nothing they can do regardless.

I promise, I'm really not trying to be a downer, nor am I depressed or even angry, but I realize these past few posts haven't been my best or most positive lol.

The truth is, I keep trying to look for the positive in people, even after a negative experience, as you can tell in this post I still did with Lisa - and the Comenity CSR was helpful, too, though there was nothing he could do.

But I guess I am feeling a bit disheartened, lately, because though I always thought I'd seen the worst business practices and worst in human behavior just before, and during, the recession - I'm actually seeing even worse now. 

In fact, people didn't even believe me, when I told them how people were behaving on the most menial of jobs, back when I was working a 2 jobs, during the recession -  people fighting over hours, throwing each other under the bus, etc.  

I said even back then, "It's like Reality TV mindset has taken over our culture, and our ways of dealing with each other - we've lost basic human decency in favor of selfishness - everyone is acting like they're in some sort of apocalypse and survival mode without just cause, screwing each other over, right and left, though we aren't."

Who knew we'd actually glorify that Reality TV mentality so much that we'd actually elect a president based on it? 

Well, if nothing else, at the very least, the whole country knows now I wasn't lying.

People have shifted, the world has shifted, fast, just within the last 15 years or so -what was considered rude, greedy, selfish, and basic lack of common decency is now encouraged :(

It just makes my head spin - and just want to just hide in my apartment and not go anywhere or talk to anyone lol.

But I will - eventually :)

 

Speaking of Ripley, Here's Sigourney Weaver and Samantha Bee - LOL!

In my prior posts, I mentioned the recent need to channel my inner Ripley again ...

(Actually worse, my inner Beth Dutton? lol).

Today, this video popped up in my feed - I had never seen it.

Apparently, it's from April 2019 - Sigourney Weaver helps recreate the scene where Ripley meets Newt in  "Aliens," on Full Frontal (The Samantha Bee Show) - however, with a twist ...

Comedian and political commentator, Samantha Bee, is Newt - hiding in space from the horror of having to cover, and make jokes, about the 2020 election and host the White House Correspondents Dinner ...   

Note that the very liberal Samantha Bee is so traumatized by the last election and current events, she's actually clutching a Trump rag doll (or is it a chew toy?) LOL!

Oh, the horror! Oh the humanity! 

However, after a pep talk by Ripley - and surprise appearances by journalists including Katie Couric, who is also hiding ("They mostly come out at night ... mostly" lol) - and a Ripley pep talk - she's ready to come back and cover the election with humor again.

LOLOLOL!

My Husband's - Erm - Conversation With a Trumper

(Edited - to actually much worse than it was previously LOL!)

I wasn't present, but I heard about it later - so I'm going to say what I have to say here.

That's right, in case you couldn't tell, I've found the need to channel my inner Ripley again lately, on some Trumpers  ...

No, worse.

In fact, I might even go all crazy-scary Beth Dutton tornado, on some very deserving Trumper trailer parks -  because I'm THAT tired of falsely-entitled/over-privileged delusional Trumper bullshit  lol.

Of COURSE the Trumper was the one to bring up the subject with my husband - Trumpers usually do, imagining that just because we're white and in the South that we'll agree with them.

At first my husband tried to change the subject and avoid it - and this person knows that. 

The reason that person brought it up was, they were going somewhere together yesterday, but had to wear masks to get in - and the Trumper started by first bitching about Governor Beshear, then praising Trump. 

(I can only thank GOD this trip wasn't to the gun range, as they'd originally planned lol.) 

By the way, I had told my husband that even though I liked this person, I personally wanted to keep these people at arm's length, because I already suspected they were Trumpers, and when they found out we weren't, there was going to be conflict.

So when my husband called me, terribly upset because we really liked the guy otherwise, the first thing he said was ...

Mark:  You were right - they're Trumpers. I couldn't believe the things coming out of his mouth. He brought it up because we were both wearing masks while out, we had to before we went in."

"I mean, after his tirade bitching, I even asked him if I could speak a contrary opinion before I responded,  and also said I really didn't want to talk about this with him." 

"I was looking forward to talking about Yellowstone and horses and a lot of other stuff we have in common." 

 

"With Yellowstone, he doesn't realize the difference between protecting your own family and property, when justice has failed you - VS. - walking into other people's states, territories, and neighborhoods, taking justice into your own untrained civilian hands, without being asked by law enforcement to do so, and shooting protesters just because you're afraid they could potentially riot!"

"That attitude that the entire country is your personal property makes him exactly the thing he hates - like a real estate developer or the federal government, trying to take other people's territory, from Native Americans and other ranchers, just because they can, and demonizing anyone who naysays their doing so."


"What happened at Standing Rock should've been a big clue of how Trump's government was going to go, if you criticized, opposed, or protested it. And the fact that he can condemn the police state brutality against protesters in Belarus, but condemn all protesters here, despite most being peaceful, without realizing the hypocrisy, is proof, in my mind, of too much Trump Kool-Aid drinking"

 

 

"After he said I could respond, when I did, he literally started screaming in my face and spitting.  Anybody else, and I would've punched the guy, but that's what they want so they can play victim and put it on Fox News.  So I just yelled right back in his face."

 

Me:  "I'm sorry this happened, honey, I've been there, 1,000 times, here. This is why transplants from other places have a hard time making friends here, without at least some family here, even if you had a ton of friends elsewhere, like you did in Detroit. I know you wanted to be friends and are disappointed, I'm so sorry.

 

"And you still CAN be friends, if you want, it's just going to be tricky, because even though you have a lot of other things in common, underneath it all, you both will know that your values are completely different."  

 

But we can't forget that Trumpers  project and gaslight - THEY are the ones who've been propagandized/brainwashed - without any true factual evidence - to believe that any Democrat OR Republican who doesn't support Trump is 'the Satanic/demonic enemy trying to destroy this country.' 

 

So just try to remember that his vehemence, the screaming and spitting - it's not really about you or what you said - it's fear-based, it's coming from his own irrational fears and paranoia, not even really about you at all, and possibly arguing with his own conscience and guilt, because he knows some of these things he's supporting are selfish, greedy, and morally wrong, and actually ANTI Christ's message." 

 

 

"Again, this isn't Detroit, Kentucky is tricky - this is why both Dave Chapelle and Trevor Noah said Lexington has "charming racism." 

 

"It's not that Kentucky people are nicer people, it's that they're especially skilled at being fake friendly and passive-aggressive.  And unfortunately, though it's mostly conservatives, the liberals here can be the same way, and are, at the very least, complicit and enable this broken system."  

 

"They can seem like the friendliest, nicest people in the world on the surface - if you're white, at least middle class, and evangelical.  But if you were black and/or poor and progressive Catholic or Episcopal or some other church they didn't approve of, they'd be civil and friendly, but you'd never get in their inner sanctum and there'd be trouble." 

 

"As long as you go along and pretend everything they do is fine, you'll be fine.  But if you're like me and can't because it disturbs your soul, you won't." 

 

"You're better than me at playing the game, but I also know that it disturbs your soul, too - and that you have even less patience with Trumpers than me lol! 

 

It's just I've lived here longer, so I've learned to anticipate it and expect it and know how to keep most at arm's length, smile, and just avoid.  That is why I didn't rush right out with my mask to hang out with them, too, I've learned from living here too long." 

 

"Be careful, now, though - learn from my mistakes here.  I wouldn't say another word because like I said, they're passive-aggressive - the type to smile in your face but pour something in your coffee later lol.  Not literally, but everything is behind your back or through others, never telling what they did to you privately or to provoke you first, of course, when they tell the story, but always making themselves the victim." 

 

"If so inclined, they can find a way to screw you in the community for it, with a smile on their face, and if you say anything directly to them about doing so, they will smile and act like you're making it up and crazy, they'll make themselves the victim."  

 

"My advice after living here and mistakes?  Don't mention it ever again, to anyone, but no need to apologize for standing up either.  Neither one of us are very good at kissing ass anyway.   Just either act like it didn't happen or it's all okay, a bad day, water under the bridge and move on, but stay at arm's length to protect yourself." 

 

However, as I said, I wasn't there - so I'M going to speak now, from here. 

 

So let me say this now - unequivocally  - not only to them, but to all Trump supporters.

That's right, brace yourselves - because I'm now about to go all Beth-Dutton crazy, up in here, on your delusional asses  LOL. 

...

If you didn't even bother to watch the George Floyd video or others before you spoke about protests and riots - it's like voting without being informed, and therefore we don't want to discuss it with you - because you really have no clue what all the fuss is about to even knowledgeably speak on the subject, and are therefore just arguing from an emotionally-manipulated, fear-based place.


And if you are voting for Trump for stupid, selfish reasons -- i.e. you don't like it that you have to wear a mask when you go places, can't go to football games, etc. - - despite the fact that Woodward caught Trump on audio stating he was downplaying the severity - - you really are the poster children of white-privileged, selfish, spoiled brats, just throwing tantrums about what you're temporarily not allowed to do - even though it's for your own safety and the safety of others!


News flash, Trumpers - not everything is about YOU and just YOUR rights - there are other taxpaying people in this country who do not share your opinion or experience, who've been restricted from the good life for generations!


Is your world really THAT small, and has life been THAT easy for you, up until now, such that having to wear a mask is seriously the worst thing that's ever happened to you, and the only restriction ever placed on you, in your over-privileged life?

Then I'm GLAD you have to wear a mask - not only for your own safety and the safety of others - but because somebody finally told you that you can't do something - - and God forbid, this one is actually because of how it affects the health of other people!

Now you know what it feels like to be told you can't/restricted from the good life, too - but instead of learning that empathy lesson, you can't even handle a few months without becoming bitter, tantrum-throwing, gun-toting asshole!


So can you really not understand why some people of color and women are so angry after centuries of it, then?!?

 

And by the way, the reason why some of us are sailing right through these restrictions without becoming depressed or angry is BECAUSE we're used to it - we know what it's like to feel restricted chronically, and could never afford to do all the things you've been lucky enough to receive, but take for granted and are unappreciative of anyway, crediting yourself and your "hard work" for!


Has it ever even occurred to you that while you play around all day on Fox News, Facebook, Twitter, watching Yellowstone clips on YouTube instead of working - or have 2-hour paid "business" lunches at Malone's - or "do business" on the golf course - or take 5 paid vacation weeks a year - - that hourly-wage, manual-labor people get restricted internet access, exactly two 15-minute breaks and a 30 minute lunch, and don't even have paid vacations nor even health insurance until Obamacare?!?


And yet you still imagine yourselves 'working harder' for the "right" to these benefits than manual hourly laborers do, that you've somehow worked harder and earned it, are more deserving, smarter, better people, instead of reality, which is that you were already born into a situation which already afforded you greater opportunities to work towards luxury?




You're too smart to be reading/watching Fox News - which you should've been smart enough to realize, by now, is speculative opinion dressed up as fact, written on a third-grade level, as well as that there were actual verifiable facts about this president you didn't even know about, because Fox News never told you.


And other facts, like even though there is a small faction of Anti-Fa in Washington and Oregon, there is no proof whatsoever that they, or anyone, started and funded ALL the protests across America.


I happen to personally know many protesters, and they were NOT paid - AND - you admitted Lexington's protests were peaceful yourself, as were many, including Portland's - UNTIL - Trump tear gassed even peaceful protesters in D.C. and sent in federal agents to Portland!


Never forget the order of events and the whys!


But instead, you want to over-inflate Anti-Fa and invent 'Satanic' boogeymen to blame - simply because your fragile little ego can't admit the truth and deal with reality - which is that there IS a double-standard in our justice system in America!


Nor can your fragile egos handle the fact that this president that you voted for is, at the very least, making everything worse, instead of helping to heal and unite this nation!


As my husband already said, extremists on both sides are making the problem worse - and Trump is taking one extreme side and responding to any opposition, peaceful or not, with authoritarianism like that in Belarus and Russia!


For a smart guy, you're being incredibly naive and stupid, not to mention extraordinarily greedy and selfish!


Lastly, please stop imagining yourself John Dutton, you're no John Dutton - as IF he's a hero anyway!


I mean, John Dutton literally brands his own cowboys/ranch hands as his personal property, for God sakes, and then orders them killed if they ever try to leave - who does that?!?


But he at least has some small semblance of basic human decency, compassion, and sanity left, however small.


In fact, I can say this now freely - though I laughed along, I never took it as a compliment or appreciated you calling my husband "your Rip Wheeler."


If you really knew my husband, you'd know he's actually more of a Kayce Dutton, the former Navy Seal, who is otherwise a peaceful, loving, fair, and compassionate person, who refuses to murder people just because his Dad wants him to, due to perceived disloyalty.


Kayce has only killed as a soldier in self-defense or when justice failed him/his wife, regarding their kidnapped son, or on behalf his wife's Native-American people, where wealthy white men have raped and killed Native American women without consequence, taking advantage of territory jurisdiction issues.

 

Speaking of Monica, though I joke about going Beth Dutton, I'm proudly a Monica :)


Though she's all about peace and love and education, make no mistake - she proved she can throw down and "Go Beth Dutton," too, if she really needs to.


(In the very last episode of season 2, when her son was kidnapped, and then what she did this season 3, after a serial white rapist/killer came to town, again, who was taking advantage of jurisdiction issues on Native American reservations. )

Regardless, if these were the only choices - Rip Wheeler and John Dutton - it would, in fact, be the other way around - my husband would be more of the brain/John Dutton and YOU are the hotheaded muscle, Rip, which you just proved today!

 

 

 

More proof of your over-privileged and over-sized ego and Trump-style fantasy delusion!


I am happy, and have no reservations, to burst your bubble, by putting aside my Monica for the moment, and pulling a Beth in this post :)

Speaking of Dutton's character on the show, although he does have a brain, his pride often supercedes it.

I mean, John Dutton owns 100,000 acres in Yellowstone that he can no longer afford.

For the love of God and all that is holy, how much land does a person need to run a cattle ranch?!?

He makes it about a promise to his father, but that's bullshit - it's his PRIDE that's caused the problem, and he's put his family through enough.


F*ck his damn over-inflated American pride! At this point, the smartest and best thing for everybody would be to sell half of his land to casino owner, Thomas Rainwater, taking his much lower offer, but essentially giving back the land to the Native Americans, where it rightfully belongs!

Dutton would still would have 50,000 acres, which is plenty of land to run a cattle ranch, plus he could then use the profit to pay his bills and continue run his his ranch.

Then, both Dutton and Rainwater could work together to fight off the "imminent domain/manifest destiny" that is real-estate developer and federal government BS.



DUH?!? How hard is that problem to solve!?!



And by the way, Mr. White-Hatted Cowboy Hero - not a single one of you self-purported "Christian white gentlemen" who imagine yourselves cavalry (and women) came to my aid, nor provided any true, empathetic guidance, back when I really was a damsel in distress - you just found more ways to victim-blame, shame, and demonize me as being deserving of all it!


And even though I understood your limited perspective due to white privileges you take for granted, I would STILL have helped YOU anyway, if in need.


However, at this point, you - and the white-stallion high horses your over-privileged asses rode in on, carrying the cross of Christ as subterfuge for a multitude of sins - ***MAY F*CK RIGHT OFF***!

________________________________

PS. - Okay, I got carried away, that last part isn't true - I'd would STILL help you, if you asked for and really needed it -  but until then, the "you may f*ck right off" stands lol.  

Bad AND Good Dream ...

I realize it's 9/11 and I had intended to have radio silence, but I had this dream and am writing this down to remember it.  

I'm not sure if I'm going to publish it yet, because it could be twisted (when it's just a dream!).  If I do and remove it later, just know it's not because I'm hiding something, but because it feels too vulnerable - but remember, it was just a dream.

A very significant one, at least for me - and strangely validating - and perhaps also could be for others watching this evangelical Trump nonsense, too.  

I'm hoping finally feel like people are wisening up to just how dangerous that certain forms of evangelicals - and certain evangelicals - can actually be. At least I hope people are. 

And even if they don't, I know now, what I didn't then - they are the crazy ones - mob rule does not make the mob right!

Something similar happened to the events of this dream, once, although it was completely different circumstances and it did not end the same way - meaning I did not say/do these things, nor were any police called - I guess it's a "fantasy" ending lol.

Anyway, here goes ... 

My grandmother was still alive and my daughter was young, probably around 4 - but it was as if COVID was going on.   My mother came and picked my grandmother up for church to have prayer for healing from lung cancer.  

I rushed up to the church, with my daughter in the back seat of the car, with some masks.  

I caught my grandmother at the door of the church, so I told my daughter to stay in the car and ran up to her with a mask.

Me:  "Granny, please ... put this on, please.  If' I'm wrong, your still safe, but if you're wrong, you catch COVID on top of cancer and die sooner."

 

Granny: "I'll be fine.  They're going to pray for me, I have faith. I'm going to get well."

 

Me:  "I want that to be true, too, Granny, but how can I take care of you if you don't do what you're supposed to do?  I have faith too, but God expects us to use wisdom.  Which means we don't do things like handle snakes in church or walk in to a room full of non-socially distanced people and not wear a mask during a deadly virus pandemic.  Please?  Please, just put this on."

 

I kept my voice down, but was holding out the mask.  

 

Everyone walking in the church started laughing at me:  "She's crazy, see?  Her mother's right."

 

Granny:  "Chrystal, just go home, I'll be fine."

 

Me:  "Granny, Trump said, on audio tape, that he purposely downplayed it, please, listen to me. Didn't you hear that on the news?  Didn't Fox News tell you that? Please, just take it, just in case?"

 

Granny:  "Chrystal, go home, I have faith." ... and then walked inside. 

 

I turned around to see my mother and the pastor's wife had gotten my daughter out of the car and walked in past me. 

 

I ran in and said to my daughter:

 

"Honey, come on with Mommy, please.  You can come with Nana another day" -- and tried to take her from my Mom.

My mom would not let go. 

 

Mom:   "Help, she's attacking me!  XXXXXXX, your mommy is attacking me!"

 

Me:   "No, Mommy's not attacking Nana.  Just give me my daughter, please, Mom.  NOW."  

 

Mom:  "No, she's better with me.  They're going to pray for her, she won't get COVID. None of us will.  Our faith is too strong." 

 

My daughter starts crying.  

 

Me:  "Oh, I know, honey, but it's okay.  Just come on with Mommy.  You can come back another day, okay? Just not right now." 

 

But while my arms were around her, I dug my nails into my Mom's arm so she'd have to let go.

 

Mom:  "Help!"

 

 Me: "Yeah, no, somebody help ME!  I'm surrounded by crazy people who think prayer saves them from COVID, won't follow social distancing restrictions and wear a mask, but think I'M crazy for wearing one, and that they can just abduct my daughter from the car, and know better than me how to raise my daughter, just because they're addicted to their own personal Jesus!"

 

People rushed over.

 

Me:  "Anyone touches my daughter, you go down, you understand me?  I'm walking out of this church with my child."

 

Pastor's Wife:  "She's crazy, she's demon-possessed - call the police!"

 

Me:  "Do it!  Call them!  I don't care how much money you have versus me, or how much you wave the Jesus flag, or even if the police believe you lot - in the end, legally, she's still MY child and you had no right to take her out of the car and bring her in here, without my permission!" 

 

"This thing is real, I type health reports for a living.  I'm sorry you don't believe in it and believe prayer will save you, and that Trump is your Messiah in graven-image idolatry.  I pray too, you know, I believe in Christ - but sometimes prayer doesn't save you, especially from the consequences of your own poor choices! "

 

Then I leaned over and whispered to my mother ... 

 

Me:  "Now, you listen to me.  If she catches this and dies, you die - are we clear? I am sick of your bullshit.  You couldn't raise a cactus, you crazy old bat, what makes you think you could raise my daughter? And stop blaming Dad for your crazy - you're both crazy as hell by your own merits. I did not grow up in a vacuum, if I'm crazy, how do you think I got this way?"

 

I then ran to the car with my daughter,  who was crying and didn't understand.

 

Me:  "Honey, I know you don't understand this and what it must look like, and it's okay if you're mad at me, but I AM trying to protect you. Don't worry about Nana, Nana is okay, she just didn't get her way, that's all.  But everything is going to be fine, but let's get you home and into a bath."  

 

 

And then I woke up, my heart was beating so fast.

Again, I guess it's a fantasy ending - this did not happen. 

I was once in a similar situation with her, but not at a church and no police were called - and no, I did not end things this way.

I did not - nor would I ever - threaten her, or anyone else with death, nor could I ever kill anyone - and I honest to God do NOT wish my mother, or anyone else, harm or death.

However, I DO wish there were some consequences and accountability for her behavior and her enablers, but I really gave up on that idea years ago.

And by that, I mean consequences other than her being hospitalized over 10 times for mental illness - including hallucinations which included her being an angel or a demon, and not knowing who or where she was.

Which of course they, and certain members of my family, just brush off as either the "side effects" of being a prophetess of God, or as being the fault of others or "Satan" - actually encouraging her to NOT to take her meds, saying "God will heal you, if you have enough faith."

Regardless, point being, although I guess I must have some buried residual anger towards my mom, I actually also sometimes feel sorry for my Mom, but I can't let her know it because she'd use it/manipulate it, she's done it before. 

But I can't even kill a spider - and I hate spiders! (I put a cup over them and scoot them outside lol).


In fact, the other day, I released a struggling wasp from a spider's web, risking being stung despite a moderate allergic to wasps (severe allergy to honeybees), because I couldn't stand to watch it struggle, with the spider already on its way - it just made me so sad :(

So I felt guilt and shame, for saying these things even in my dream, when I first woke up.


However, I then realized you can't control what you dream, and in fact, the dream was therapeutic - just my mind's way of resolving the unresolved, helping me feel less powerless from a past similar situation, long ago - as well as it didn't end with me feeling the like crazy one, in the end?

In fact, I actually have much scarier/worse stories I could tell about some evangelicals, that really happened, in real life - but I'll spare you the details lol.




That is not to say ALL evangelicals - but most do have a tendency towards group-flock behavior/brainwashing and swallowing whole one person's subjective interpretation of the bible and events, without question.

For example, if one church leader says that something or someone is "of the devil," they all will, despite facts, and never considering that that leader might be gaslighting to cover for their own misdeeds.


Many people - especially if white and wealthy - get away with even criminal things if they just wave the Jesus flag for cover - and you're crazy if you don't go along with it.

Even if they're caught red-handed with undeniable evidence, they tend to protect and enable the abuser, preferring the church "counsel" them rather than that person face justice and go to jail - i.e., Josh Duggar's pedophilia.

Point being, I've been saying for a long time that many evangelicals are not well people - and that mentality permeates not only entire families, but the entire culture, especially here in the South - evangelicals are an integral part of enabling our broken socioeconomic system.

Now, for the first time in history, we're seeing just how dangerous some forms of evangelicalism can be - and using Jesus' name as a get out of jail or the mental hospital free card perhaps isn't going to fly anymore.

At least, I hope that's the end result of all this, someday. 

And even if people still don't get how crazy this mentality is, I know now, what I didn't then ... though I have my trauma issues, to be sure - they are the crazy ones - (brainwashed) mob rule does not make the mob right.

Jesus was never meant to be used as cover for a multitude of sins. 

PS   -  And now, a song about being group-gaslighted, and the video itself includes apparent church approval of the common practice of gaslighting any naysayers. 

The song was written after The Dixie Chicks were black-balled from country music and gaslighted, after lead singer, Natalie Maines, said on stage, while in London in 2003, that she did not support a "pre-emptive strike war in Iraq without evidence, and that she was "Ashamed that POTUS (GW Bush) was from Texas."   


Though she has apologized for the effect it had on the other members of the band, she has not, and will not, apologize for saying it - and quite honestly, I don't think she ever should.


Radio stations refused to play her song, there were mass smashing of their CD, she received death threats and was smeared as crazy and a traitor, and the Dixie Chicks were smeared as "Sadam's Angels" and "Dixie Sluts." 

One death threat said if she didn't "Shut Up and Sing," she would be killed on a specific time and date.  

Regardless of whether or not that's true, "Shut Up and Sing" was the name of their documentary on the subject in 2007 -a phrase that was revisited when Taylor Swift finally spoke up against Trump - and a phrase that only female artists tend to hear when they speak up politically, as opposed to men.

This song was released in 2007, and discusses the ability to forgive, but the enduring trauma the experience has made on her life.



Despite the fact that GW Bush has since said he received bad intel and has apologized for the "mistake" of the war first in Iraq - and it is popular knowledge that the "pre-emptive" strike war towards Iraq instead of Afghanistan was bogus - the band has never recovered to the popularity it once had, and they have never received public apology or reinstatement of no wrongdoing and being criminalized and black-balled for for exercising their right to freedom of speech.

Much like Natalie, I, too, am chronically that kid that points out emperors and empresses that aren't wearing clothes (even if I never say it, and just don't loudly clamor and praise the person) - so I get it ;)

The Chicks (formerly The Dixie Chicks)  - "Not Ready to Make Nice" 

Forgive, sounds good
Forget, I'm not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I'm still waiting

I'm through with doubt
There's nothing left for me to figure out
I've paid a price, and I'll keep paying

I'm not ready to make nice
I'm not ready to back down
I'm still mad as hell, and I don't have time
To go 'round and 'round and 'round

It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
'Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should

I know you said
Why can't you just get over it?
It turned my whole world around
And I kinda like it

I made my bed, and I sleep like a baby
With no regrets, and I don't mind saying
It's a sad, sad story
When a mother will teach her daughter
That she ought to hate a perfect stranger

And how in the world
Can the words that I said
Send somebody so over the edge
That they'd write me a letter
Saying that I better
Shut up and sing
Or my life will be over?

I'm not ready to make nice
I'm not ready to back down
I'm still mad as hell, and I don't have time
To go 'round and 'round and 'round

It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
'Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should

I'm not ready to make nice
I'm not ready to back down
I'm still mad as hell, and I don't have time
To go 'round and 'round and 'round

It's too late to make it right
I probably wouldn't if I could
'Cause I'm mad as hell
Can't bring myself to do what it is
You think I should, what it is you think I should

Forgive, sounds good
Forget, I'm not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I'm still waiting ...

At This Point, All I Have Left to Say About Trump ...

(*edited - I have added the actual audio of Trump stating to Woodward COVID was deadly back in January, because Trump is calling it "fake news," in the hopes that his supporters will once again believe him and dismiss it without checking it out for themselves ;)

... is "I told you so - " about both Bob Woodward's tape of Trump admitting denying the severity of COVID to the American public, as well as the DHS whistle-blower regarding downplaying Russia interference and the actual threat of White Supremacy. 

This is one of those times I'm not too happy with being right/able to say "I told you so" - but nevertheless, I did -  several times/posts. 

And "downplay" is an understatement as far as COVID - because as I wrote about in this post from March 2nd - which included video - of Trump literally saying it was a "Democrat hoax meant to undermine the election."  


(*Note the Woodward tape is dated February 7th.)


And if anyone believes his excuse, that he just didn't want to "scare and panic " the American public -  when he fear-mongers daily in capital letters on Twitter, over nothing burgers - then you'll believe I'm Mother Theresa. 



We all know the real reasons he downplayed both because he was afraid both would make him look bad/hurt his chances of re-election - period.

And yet accused us of politicizing the virus? :/

Like I said, whatever Trump accuses others of, he is guilty of himself - he's the king of projection, as deflection of his own guilt -  a true textbook narcissist. 

Regardless, both downplaying COVID and Russian election interference are treasonous actions. 




I recall so much bellyaching about 'lack of transparency' with Obama - where are those people now?

*crickets*



Oh, but Trump is white and is anti-abortion and LGBTQ for pay/votes, so it's still all okay. 

*sarcasm*



Otherwise, the first thing I said, when I heard about Woodward's tape/book is, "Why didn't Woodward release the tape sooner?"

The only plausible answer I can speculate for that is that he wanted to complete the full book with all of the information he had before presenting it, or perhaps legalities with the publisher - and yet I can't help but wonder how many lives could've been saved, if he had released just that piece, sooner  :(